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Burnout Among Doctors

Updated: Jan 27

The British Medical Journal (BMJ), which is the journal for UK doctors, this month wrote a damning three page article on burnout amongst doctors.


Interestingly, although they talked about burnout, they didn't give any concrete solutions other than in the last paragraph, where it states that "A spokesperson for NHS England says that the NHS staff are working incredibly hard to meet rising demand for care, which can take a toll on their wellbeing: ‘While there is more that we could and should do... and there is a range of mental health support for staff, including coaching and wellbeing resources.’”


Ananta Dave, a psychiatrist and Chief Medical Officer of an Intergrated Care Board, last year published a review of suicide in the medical profession. Dave said the statistics on burnout are damning, saying "Burnout essentially arises out of poorly managed worksplace conditions."


Burnout among doctors

A General Medical Council (GMC) survey found that 40 percent of doctors were at risk of burnout in 2023. One quarter of doctors have taken leave of absence in the past year owing to stress. One in three doctors reported as 'struggling.' 50 percent of General Practitioners are 'struggling.'


The World Health Organisation (WHO) describes burnout as an occupational phenomenon resulting from chronic workplace stress. Burnout is a feeling of exhaustion, increased mental distance from your job (or feelings of negativism related to work), and reduced professional efficacy. In short you feel detached and depleted. Studies show that this is not due to a lack of 'reslience' as often said by the GMC, but that doctors need organisional support to alleviate stress and manage their distress.


Last April doctors reacted with outrage to the news that NHS Practitioner Health, which is funded by the NHS in England, would be closed to new signups. Research has shown that the staff contacting NHS Practitioner Health services were sicker or had more serious addictions than those generally using other NHS mental health services, and some were also going through regulatory procedures (with the GMC). Stigma and fears about confidentiality are also major concerns among those the service supports.


Clare Gerada, Former president of the Royal College of General Practitioners and the founder of NHS Practitioner Health, says that there's always been a lack of understanding about why doctors need a specialist service. She speaks from experience, having had burnout when her children were small. In her book on burnout, which explores why doctors are at high risk, Gerada says that the condition often affects those who have been the most “idealistic, enthusiastic, and engaged”: In other words, the best doctors.



GP Claire Davies said about doctors that "By the time we seek help, we end up with six months off sick."


For some doctors, burnout can lead to an incredibly dark place. Of around 6,500 clinicians who contacted NHS Practitioner Health in a year, a third say that they've had suicidal ideation.


The BMA it says that the medical profession has had a toxic culture for a long time, which has made it hard for people to admit that they're struggling, as the regulatory body (the GMC) saw it as a sign of weakness.





As a society, we are doing it all wrong. As Dr Gabor Maté wrote "Illness in this society, physical or mental, they are not abnormalities. They are normal responses to an abnormal culture. This culture is abnormal when it comes to real human needs." For many, being alive has become intolerably painful.


Sydney Banks wrote “Mental health lies within the consciousness of all human beings, but it is shrouded and held prisoner by our own erroneous thoughts.” The role of compassionate institutions would be to gently guide our thinking but most of the institutions that are pretending to lead don't know how to do that: They are more afraid of their own survival than doing the right thing for human beings.


It's no wonder that we are mentally ill. The very nature of our 'Hustle', 'profit-before-people,' culture is making us all ill: We are treated as though we are all disposable. Actually we are indispensible - when the majority of human beings are mentally ill because of the dictates of our culture, we all really need to take a stand on this, changing our culture to one of compassionate leadership. The data shows that 85% of people are dysfunctional. The norm is dysfunctionality.



As Marianne Williamson said in her book 'Tears to Triumph: The Spiritual Journey From Suffering to Enlightenment' "Being human is not a disease." She continued, that the epidemic of depression that we are seeing is a "Collective cry for the healing of our hearts."


Mahatma Gandhi said “The problem with the world is that humanity is not in its right mind.” We need therapy less than we need a collective healing of the institutions that 'govern' us. We are being bathed in toxicity and we are expected to cope. We are not coping.


At no point in my medical career did I have a mental health assessment, despite having been employed in over a dozen leading teaching hospitals in London and Cambridge. When I crossed professional boundaries due to mental illness that I was unaware of, I was treated utterly inhumanely, and the institutions that are meant to care for those caring for patients heaped shame and trauma on me, despite their awareness of my childhood trauma, my severe depression, my generalised anxiety disorder and my compulsivity. Shame, trauma, and mental illness were the result of my dysfunctional childhood: How could anyone possibly think that giving a further dose of trauma and shame to someone who was mentally ill as a result of trauma would be a good or compassionate idea, or serve anyone? They also decapitated me rather than allowing me to participate fully free from stigma and discrimination, as recommended by the WHO. To have suffered childhood trauma and the unbearable pain of abandonment from one's own family and then to receive the same from one's profession after so many years of dedication to it is very challenging to bear. Doctors who are mentally ill (85% of all doctors) are terrified of seeking treatment as we know that the regulatory bodies are so antiquated and lack any compassion that they intend only to destroy us. After a three year wait, while I was suspended from practising medicine, I was cross-examined for seven hours, including speaking about my childhood trauma, which should not be done in a non-therapeutic setting, as anyone medically trained would know. It was nothing short of a horrific experience. I would never wish that trauma and horror on anyone. I am not sure how many people would survive it: Many don't.


The psychiatrist from the regulatory body that assessed me had no training in my condition, and was very derogatory about the concept of personal transformation, showing a total lack of a modern holistic psychiatric approach to mental wellbeing. I was declared medically fit to work by her but was beheaded by the regulatory body and the Royal College (the shameful Royal College of Surgeons of England) that I belonged to in any case. I was not given any support by them at any stage of my career or before or during or after the hearing. Fortunately, my own NHS psychiatrist was a much wiser, informed, up-to-date and caring professional, who understood that much of the recovery from mental illness is not just giving medication to numb the pain (one needs to feel emotions in order to grow, know the deepest Truths about life and what it is to be a human being and to recover): Recovery involves a journey of personal transformation to recover your true Self as stated by Carl Jung, the greatest pyschiatrist of all time. What saved my life was not psychiatry or psychotherapy, but it was having a guide who had a much more modern, all-encompassing view of how the world, life and people operate: An Enlightened Witness. As Baruch Spinoza wrote "The highest activity a human being can attain is learning for understanding, because to understand is to be free." When the regulatory bodies have a guillotine as their only tool, it is no wonder that they are decapitating professionals and destroying so many families. There is no tool on their belt labelled 'understanding' or 'compassion'. One has to suspect that either they lack understanding of mental illness, or that they are more afraid of the tabloid press and trolls than of doing the right thing by human beings who are mentally ill, in other words patients, who happen to be doctors. Is this really the kind of world that we want to live in? Plato said "No law or ordinance is mightier than understanding."


Publicly available data shows that two out of three surgeons in some surgical subspecialties have mental health conditions. But no-one, including the Royal College of Surgeons, is doing anything at all about it, out of fear for their own survival. What is the point of these institutions? Over one in five UK surgeons are alcoholics, with many more having other mental health issues. Surgeons have a six times higher suicide rate than the general population despite our resilience. The burnout rate in the NHS is 75 percent. Mentally ill surgeons have a six times higher complication rate. 36 percent of UK surgeons have trauma symptoms, and 12 percent of UK surgeons have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. For a brilliant overview of childhood trauma read the book by Pete Walker 'Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving.' According to "The Body Keeps The Score" by Van Der Kolk, nearly half of childhood trauma survivors numb their feelings with addictions. 75 percent of superachievers suffer in silence from childhood trauma, until it's too late. The effectiveness of medical organisations depends on the wellbeing of doctors. Michael West, professor of organisational psychology, said that the NHS should be run on compassion. In his interview, he says that the total lack of a compassionate view towards NHS staff in regard to their wellbeing has created the workforce staffing crisis in medicine. That is why you are waiting so long for appointments, procedures, and surgery. Doctors don't want to be doctors any more, because we are treated like dogs (and put down) by those who are supposed to care for us: They don't care.


Despite my efforts to demonstrate insight and remediation the regulatory body demonstrated its outdated archaic ignorance of mental health. I had had three months of intensive psychotherapy with over 200 hours of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT), a full course of Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) treatment for childhood trauma (8 sessions), 100 hours of coaching, a mentor, 6 months training in personal transformation, I qualified as a coach during this period, had weekly psychodynamic therapy (a modern form of psychoanalysis) for 18 months, read over 250 books on psychology, mental health, wellbeing, and personal transformation, joined, formed, and run recovery groups with hundreds of members, started regular meditation and yoga, took up long distance running again, got my life into balance, have set up a men's vulnerability group, and have had an awakening of my true Self: I don’t believe that anyone has ever done more to recover. But the GMC slaughtered me anyway. Neither of the GMC psychiatrists diagnosed my undiagnosed Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) despite lengthy assessments.


I have a glowing 40 page CV. I worked in the NHS for 20 years, having performed 14,000 operations for trauma, cancer, and reconstruction without any complaints and having glowing annual appraisals throughout my career. But somehow the regulatory body thought it was best to exclude me when I became mentally ill, despite there being a national waiting list of over seven million patients. It’s really no wonder at all that the NHS is in crisis and meltdown. It is fuc*ed, and deservedly so.


Carl Jung, the founding father of modern psychiatry and psychoanalysis described the journey of mental healing as one of transformation which “Can only happen to you when you walk on a path, which leads you to a higher understanding… Through a reeducation of the mind.” This letter was written in 1961. That was 63 years ago. This is the path that I have walked. One would have thought that medical institutions would have caught up by now on what mental wellbeing should look like. Tragically, I won’t be holding my breath. Henry David Thoreau wrote "Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves." Mental illness is an opportunity to thrive in possibility and find your Real Personal Power, despite those institutions that do their very best to destroy you: Well, they didn't.


There is no compassion for mentally ill doctors. Especially from the medical profession, it's supposed 'recovery groups', which are not actually recovery groups, and the institutions that 'govern' doctors. My experience of them all has been absolutely horrific. Doctors are patients too: We are all human beings the last time I checked. We are sick patients trying to get well, not bad doctors trying to become good. It is well recognised that compassion is essential to recovery and wellbeing.


The medical institutions are broken, they have been told so by their own leaders, and they know it, but they don't know how to become compassionate leaders, or don't want to do anything about it through fear of their own demise: Doctors are voting with their feet, and leaving the profession as quickly as they can. Dame Clare Marx said that she "Emphasises the need for organisations to have leaders that act compassionately and promote wellbeing." Yet they press on, destroying lives. They speak of diversity and inclusion, yet completely forget to include those with mental illness and neurodiversity. This is very convenient for them as it would involve caring for the vast majority of us. Their words are hollow and just a nod to wellbeing, without any substance. Since 2005, 33 doctors have committed suicide whilst under professional investigation by the GMC: 33 families that have been detonated for generations. Medicine has become institutionalised and those toxic institutions are poisoning doctors and making them sick. All attacks are based on fear: Fear of not surviving. These attacks are made unwittingly and yet they are insidious.


When up to two thirds of the medical workforce is mentally ill it seems easier for our 'leaders' to decapitate those of us who put our heads above the parapet rather than understanding and addressing the reality of the situation. Their only focus is on the tip of the iceberg above the waterline. We all know what happened to the Titanic. Mental illness should not be a death sentence. One would think that doctors and those that supposedly look after their wellbeing should know that. Well, they really don't have any insight: At all.


To anyone going through this horror show, remember that the Truth is that this too shall pass and, as John Green wrote that "There is hope, even when your brain tells you there isn’t." It's ok to be vulnerable, in fact it's the only way to be authentic, connect with others, and to grow. As Brené Brown wrote "Vulnerability sounds like Truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they're never weakness." So, to those institutions that are supposed to lead us, I would suggest that you perhaps stop talking to us about 'resilience', and instead begin to have compassion for us. Would you have survived my childhood trauma?  Is it any wonder that more than half of our doctors in training are leaving medicine?


Professor Elyn R. Saks, Professor of Law, Psychology, and Psychiatry and the Behavioral Sciences, said that the “Stigma against mental illness is a scourge with many faces, and the medical community wears a number of those faces.”


As a doctor, I truly don't believe that burnout in any profession is due to workout stress. It is my firm belief that when you are following your calling you have infinite capability, possibilty, and energy. When you are being driven as you are not in a role that relates to your divine purpose or soul, everything will always be too much.


What can be done about the mental health pandemic?

Firstly, we need increased awareness. This means removing all stigma around mental illness, as well as introducing education programmes. Despite progress in some countries, people with mental health conditions often experience severe human rights violations, discrimination, and stigma, according to a WHO statement. Bill Clinton wrote “Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of, but stigma and bias shame us all.“ In the scientific article 'Mental illness-related stigma in healthcare' it summarises that "Mental illness-related stigma, including that which exists in the healthcare system and among healthcare providers, has been identified as a major barrier to access treatment and recovery, as well as poorer quality physical care for persons with mental illnesses... An organisational culture that promotes staff health and wellbeing and is committed to combatting stigma in patient care is likely to have a positive impact on staff and patient safety as well as the financial bottom line."


Glenn Close wrote "What mental health needs is more sunlight, more candour, and more unashamed conversation." The eminent psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler Ross wrote "The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen." Those people become Enlightened Witnesses. So, why are those people being burned like witches? They stopped burning witches centuries ago because witches were never real. 9 million 'witches' were executed. And not one of them was a witch! Does this sound familiar? It turns out that the only evil people were those doing the burning. Funny that. When it comes to stigma and medical institutions, remember again that "Those who judge will never understand, and those who understand will never judge." It's time to stop the witch-hunts and realise that we are all human.


Secondly, we need to take immediate action to identify, address, treat, and if possible, reverse the condition once a person is experiencing mental illness. Sadly, the waiting lists on the National Health Service for psychotherapy are over 18 months. This is true even for patients who are suicidal. I know this to be a fact through personal experience. Click here for my suicide notes. There is a chronic global shortage of mental health resources. This is a horrifyingly atrocious situation. Mental health support needs to be immediately available to all. The WHO states that “Many mental health conditions can be effectively treated at relatively low cost, yet the gap between people needing care and those with access to care remains substantial. Effective treatment coverage remains extremely low.”


Thirdly, mental wellness checkups need to become as routine and socially acceptable as any other checkup or investigation such as blood pressure checks and COVID-19 tests. Screening tools need to be developed for easy use and access to mental health services.



Coaching and mental illness amongst doctors Again, in the BMJ article although they talked about burnout, they didn't give any concrete solutions other than in the last paragraph, where it states that "A spokesperson for NHS England says that the NHS staff are working incredibly hard to meet rising demand for care, which can take a toll on their wellbeing.: "While there is more that we could and should do... and there is a range of mental health support for staff, including coaching and wellbeing resources.

So how can coaching help with those who are struggling? We are doing it all wrong. As Dr Gabor Maté wrote in his brilliant book 'The Myth of Normal' “Work pressures, multitasking, social media, news updates, multiplicities of entertainment sources - these all induce us to become lost in thoughts, frantic activities, gadgets, meaningless conversations. We are caught up in pursuits of all kinds that draw us on not because they are necessary or inspiring or uplifting, or because they enrich or add meaning to our lives, but simply because they obliterate the present.” Anxiety comes from living in the future. Depression and fear come from living in the past. Peace is only found in the present. As the therapist Shanon L Alder wrote "The true definition of mental illness is when the majority of your time is spent in the past or future, but rarely living in the realism of NOW.” in Transformative Life Coaching (TLC) I will teach you to become more present.


Is this all there is? The human brain has not evolved biologically in the last 10,000 years, so it is likely that our human condition is attributable to modern life. Modernity refers to technological changes arising after the industrial revolution. There does not appear to be such a thing as 'civilisation'. Sigmund Freud used the word 'malaise' or 'discomfort.' We have evolved to live in one environment, but we actually live in another. The faster our environment changes, the faster our brains get left behind. We now spend much of our lives in cyberspace. There is nothing inherently wrong with the internet, but much of our malaise and psychological dysfunction appears to have arisen from our limited capacity to make swift, healthy adaptations, particularly so with respect to social media. Mental illness, especially in the young, has been linked with screen time. Yearly surveys in over one million respondents show a sudden decrease in psychological wellbeing and life satisfaction after 2012. Experts have concluded that this is related to the rapid adoption of smartphones by adolescents. Tim Berners-Lee, the man who invented the internet, said that "Humanity, connected by technology on the web, is functioning in a Dystopian way."


Sales of 'self-help' books climbed by 20% in 2018. This is dominated by 'celebrity gurus' and pop-psychology. People are desperate for answers. Although charismatic figures are 'reassuring' and inspirational slogans can temporarily raise one's mood, the beneficial effects of such remedies are short-lived. Nothing has really changed. Existential angst still weighs heavily upon us. All the subtitutes offered such as iPhones, fads, diets, cosmetic treatments, positive mantras, etc., all point to our missing out on something more substantial. They are ways of avoiding feelings of emptiness that would otherwise overwhelm us. When we ask big questions, we want answers that have credible rationales. Human questions demand human answers. This is the role of the Enlightened Witness. Feeling is healing.


My two suicide attempts almost four years ago were thankfully unsuccessful. Why was I brought to my knees by mental illness, and so close to death? As Albert Einstein wrote "God doesn't play dice." I believe that I was brought to my knees so that I would pray. I was brought close to death so that I could go through a psychological and 'spiritual rebirth'. Confronting the fear of death, our deepest fear, is an integral part of any spiritual journey. It is as important now for spiritual seekers meditating in their living rooms, as it was thousands of years ago when initiates prayed in the temples of their favourite deities. The most powerful coaching, even for top executives, is 'Deep Coaching' or Transformative Life Coaching (TLC): Without such a shift in perception from the ego to our true Self or soul we end up living small and safe, making decisions with our ego minds rather than our souls. This limits our possibility for life, being held back by primal fear and false beliefs.


To live the spiritual life (I don't mean religion, which is very different to spirituality), we must learn how to 'die and be reborn'. The 'dark night of the soul' is when we take the deep plunge and come to terms with the buried aspects of us that crave death, both from our current life, our childhood trauma, and the past. It is only in coming to terms with these dark parts of ourselves that we can be free of the shadow of death, and truly live the lives our souls desire. In John 3 "Jesus answered, "I tell you the Truth, no one can enter the Kingdom of God unless he is born of water and the Spirit. Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to Spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying, `You must be born again.'" Buddha said “Just as a candle cannot burn without fire, men cannot live without a spiritual life.” It is this new life that puts the fire inside you to fuel your dreams.


I had a greater purpose than being a plastic surgeon: My 'psychological death', and my freedom from the chains of expectation of such a dysfunctional, Dystopian society, have allowed me to embrace the purpose that I was born for: To be a peaceful defender of men, who turns pain into peace and shame into Self-love by hearing your Truth and your intuition that comes from the highest version of you, when you are able to be vulnerable, open and express your emotions through your heart. A calling rather than being driven. When you are driven, you are not in control. We need Enlightened Witnesses experienced in TLC to guide us.


Joseph Campbell, who described the 'Hero's Journey', wrote “We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” It is not until you shut and lock the door behind you that the open door ahead of you becomes apparent.


My given names Olly Alexander literally mean: 'Peaceful defender of men'. This is why I have become a Transformative Life Coach for men who are in pain, fear, and shame. I have been where you are, I have felt your despair, I have suffered your pain, and I know the way forwards. The way out is through. The way in is the key to everything you ever dreamed of. Martin Luther King, Jr, wrote “Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.” Let me be your guide. Find the power of your VOICE.


In addition to the above, I would say that when one has a nervous breakdown, there is no ‘guide’ as to what to do next, when one has no hope at all. I was very fortunate that my family contacted my General Practitioner, a psychologist, and a psychiatrist. This led me to having a host of treatments and therapies, as well as coaching, mentoring, and discovering the transformative path to mental health recovery. Psychiatry numbed my pain enough to get through each day. Psychology unravelled me and made my subconscious childhood trauma conscious. Coaching saved my life, or rather I saved my life through Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). To me, it was essential. All these modalities were essential to my recovery. Having a guide was indispensable. My coach and I have now parted company as he felt that I needed to leap into the void to learn how to fly: And I have.


Each form of therapy is like a tool used to rebuild you - with its purpose but also with side-effects - like a hammer hitting your thumb. Sometimes a combination of tools (different therapies) is required to heal you. Sometimes other metaphors for Truth and forms of support are needed, like yoga in the treatment of trauma (as recommended in the brilliant book, and 'Bible of trauma', ‘The Body Keeps the Score’ by the leading expert Bessel van der Kolk. Sometimes a cosmic view of the whole toolbox, but also a view on what limitations the toolbox has, how the repairs/foundations are proceeding, and how well the building being erected is evolving are all required. This is the domain of Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). Faith is seeing the gleaming tower even before it is built. The TLC coach can see your path in a way that the therapist can't, unless they have had TLC training, as they are too close in and unaware of the 'blind-spots' in their tools.


According to the above WHO definition of mental health (as opposed to mental illness, which lies in the disciplines of psychiatry and psychology) mental health is a “State of wellbeing in which the individual realises his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community.” There is much overlap here with TLC. This is why my guide was critical to my recovery: He was very much a 'survival guide'. He was an Enlightened Witness who truly understood my path. I feel strongly that it’s not just enough to have a therapist anymore. We all also need an accountability partner. Someone to speak with regularly. Someone with compassion, love and understanding. It is so important to be listened to, as we have all the answers inside of us, but we need to verbalise them to someone else who does not judge us in order to hear them for ourselves. Let me be your guide back to wellbeing in addition to your medical support. We all need an Enlightened Witness on the path of recovering our true Selves. I have met some brilliant holistic psychiatrists, usually those who have walked the path themsleves. But I have also met some who have zero wisdom about what it means to truly heal your soul, who have clearly never read Carl Jung. They unravel you, don't heal you, and may cause more damage than they heal. I saved my Self, and I did it through TLC coaching. Only you can truly save your Self. How can someone who doesn't belive in the soul be expected to heal it?


As Elizabeth Gilbert said “Do you have the courage to bring forth the treasures that are hidden within you?” Friedrich Nietzsche believed that embracing difficulty is essential for a fulfilling life, considered the journey of Self-discovery one of the greatest and most fertile existential challenges. He wrote "Any human being who does not wish to be part of the masses need only stop making things easy for himself. Let him follow his conscience, which calls out to him: “Be yourself!" Every young soul hears this call by day and by night and shudders with excitement at the premonition of that degree of happiness which eternities have prepared for those who will give thought to their true liberation. There is no way to help any soul attain this happiness, however, so long as it remains shackled with the chains of opinion and fear. And how hopeless and meaningless life can become without such a liberation! There is no drearier, sorrier creature in Nature than the man who has evaded his own genius and who squints now towards the right, now towards the left, now backwards, now in any direction whatever... No one can build you the bridge on which you, and only you, must cross the river of life. There may be countless trails and bridges and demigods who would gladly carry you across; but only at the price of pawning and forgoing your Self. There is one path in the world that none can walk but you. Where does it lead? Don’t ask, walk!... Let the young soul survey its own life with a view of the following question: “What have you truly loved thus far? What has ever uplifted your soul, what has dominated and delighted it at the same time?” Assemble these revered objects in a row before you and perhaps they will reveal a law by their Nature and their order: The fundamental law of your very Self. Compare these objects, see how they complement, enlarge, outdo, transfigure one another; how they form a ladder on whose steps you have been climbing up to your Self so far; for your true Self does not lie buried deep within you, but rather rises immeasurably high above you, or at least above what you commonly take to be your 'I'... Even the most courageous among us only rarely has the courage to face what he already knows."


Carl Jung, the star in the pantheon of psychiatry said “Only what is really oneself has the power to heal.” In 'C.G. Jung Letters' he wrote "Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Without, everything seems discordant; only within does it coalesce into unity. Who looks outside dreams; who looks inside awakes." Jung said "I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become." Jesus had already said in Luke 4:23 "Physician, heal thyself." This is a biblical proverb meaning that people should take care of their own defects and not focus on correcting the projected faults of others. It is also the idea that you cannot fill the cup of others unless your cup is full, too. 


The compassion of possibility is when I look at even the most fearful person, I see them without judgement as the full human being that they are and that can be manifested. I am aware of that possibility. This is the level of compassion that we aim for in Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). I see and speak to the highest version of you and it brings it to life for you, free of ego. Compassion is the only thing we can actually give anyone. To be seen by another without judgement is the first step to you having Self-compassion, Self-worth and Self-love. Buddha said "You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire Universe, deserve your love and affection." That is not vanity, that is wellbeing. Love, according to Albert Einstein) is the most powerful force in the Universe. Seneca, the Stoic Philosopher, said “Love in its essence is spiritualfire.” Always remember, as Max Lucado wrote, that "You are valuable just because you exist. Not because of what you do or what you have done, but simply because you are."


Compassion is the antidote to shame, which so many of us carry. Dr Gabor Maté wrote "Whereas individual people can become dislocated by misfortunes in any society, only a free-market society produces mass dislocation as part of its normal functioning, even during periods of prosperity... When people start to lose a sense of meaning and get disconnected, that's where disease comes from, that's where breakdown in our health - mental, physical, social health - occurs, the psychiatrist and neuroscientist Bruce Perry told me. If a gene or virus were found that caused the same impacts on the population's wellbeing as disconnection does, news of it would bellow from front-page headlines. Because it transpires on so many levels and so pervasively, we almost take it for granted; it is the water we swim in... Is it possible nevertheless that our consumer culture does make good on its promises, or could do so? Might these, if fulfilled, lead to a more satisfying life? When I put the question to renowned psychologist Tim Krasser, Professor emeritus of psychology at Knox College, his response was unequivocal. "Research consistently shows," he told me, 'That the more people value materialistic aspirations as goals, the lower their happiness and life satisfaction and the fewer pleasant emotions they experience day to day. Depression, anxiety, and substance abuse also tend to be higher among people who value the aims encouraged by consumer society... As materialism promises satisfaction but, instead, yields hollow dissatisfaction, it creates more craving. This massive and self-perpetuating addictive spiral is one of the mechanisms by which consumer society preserves itself by exploiting the very insecurities it generates.'"


Consumerism is insatiable. It's an addiction. Just look at all the people wandering around shops at the weekend, like it's a pastime, regardless of their income, when the woods, parks, and forests are empty. Try taking an ipad off your toddler and see their reaction - we become addicted to consumerism from early childhood. Denis Waitly wrote “Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, Grace, and gratitude.” This is what I would call bliss and joy.


Dr Gabor Maté calls on us to get real “In many other spheres, including social media, we too often present an artificial, “Botoxed” version of ourselves: An image not of who we are but of how we would like to be perceived by others. “What we have with the internet is sort of a Botox for the masses,” Peter said. “We have just lost this capacity to be real, which is fundamentally what makes us human, and what makes us feel connected to each other.” Authenticity is key to health. This is why so many of our celebrities are dying: They have a crisis of authenticity. The fracture of their psyche causes their mental illness. They are an extreme example of how everyone is becoming right now. People don't think that they will be loved for who they are. Dr Maté continues "The onset of inauthenticity may not be a choice, but with awareness and Self-compassion, authenticity can be.”


Psychologist Lauren Fogel Mersy wrote “Being able to be your true Self is one of the strongest components of good mental health.” It's a rarity in today's world. Paulo Coelho wrote "All stress, anxiety, depression, is caused when we ignore who we are, and start living to please others.” Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the psychiatrist who described the five stages of grief, wrote “It is not the end of the physical body that should worry us. Rather, our concern must be to live while we're alive - to release our inner Selves from the spiritual death that comes with living behind a facade designed to conform to external definitions of who and what we are.” Julian Seifter adds "You are not your illness. You have an individual story to tell. You have a name, a history, a personality. Staying your Self is part of the battle." You have the Power of your VOICE. Do not feel judged by those who are asleep. Neville Goddard wrote "All the honours of men in a state of sleep are as nothing."


Dr Gabor Maté wrote "Unless we can measure something, science won’t concede it exists, which is why science refuses to deal with such “non-things” as the emotions, the mind, the soul, or the Spirit." In order to heal, we need to express our emotions, drop out of our negative thinking mind and into our open hearts, and connect with and become one with our soul, Higher Power, or true Self (these are all the same thing). As Pierre Teilhard de Chardin wrote "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience." I have found that this always leads me out of fear, even where medication and therapy have failed. Many modern psychologists including Dr Gabor Maté feel that spiritual dis-ease underlies much of our mental illness.


The 18th century German philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau, who influenced the Age of Enlightenment, argued that a proper education is one that does not include constructs and institutions created by humans for the purpose of controlling other humans. A proper education is one that allows Nature to teach humans according to their nature. His philosophy contributed to the French Revolution, overthrowing man-made institutions hiding under the guise of civil society. His most famous statement was that "Man is born free and everywhere he is in chains.” He also said that "What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?.. No man has any natural authority over his fellow men... Man is naturally good, and that it is from these institutions alone that men become wicked.” Civilisation, then, is not so civilised. Similarly to Carl Jung, Rousseau said that human beings have the unique ability to change their nature through free choice, instead of being confined to natural instincts. Who you are BEing is a moment-to-moment choice once you become conscious. He believed that humans are able to choose in a way that improves their condition. These improvements could be lasting, leading not only to individual, but also collective change for the better. Together with human freedom, the ability to improve makes possible the historic evolution of humanity. He said "God made me and broke the mold." This is true for every one of us. We are all unique and our worth is not conditional on anything. He also said "I prefer being a man with paradoxes than a man with prejudices." Prejudices are harmful judgements and are not based on reason.


My psychiatrist told me that Nature knows what it is doing and to trust the process. Dr Maté echoes “There arises the possibility of returning to what Nature has always intended for us: Once we resolve to see clearly how things are, the process of healing - a word that, at its root, means “returning to wholeness” - can begin.” This is a remembering of who we are and integrating our inner child and our Higher Self to become whole.


Faith and spirituality are disciplines of healing that use the same metaphors as psychology and philosophy to explain how one heals a fractured psyche. The first recorded instance of Jesus, a human being who was one of the greatest philosophers of all time who always lived and made choices from his Higher Self from BEing love, saying, “Your Faithhas made you well” is found in Matthew 9:22. Some versions of the Bible translate Jesus’ words as “Thy Faith hath made thee whole,” and, “Your Faith has healed you.” To me this is a metaphor for authenticity and integration of your inner child with your Higher Self. This shows how the various disciplines of positive psychology, philosophy, spiritually and Faith are different ways of describing the same Truth. Transformative Life Coaching (TLC) is a blend of all these disciplines, which are all so effective in finding peace and wellbeing, because they are actually all based on the same Truth. The Venn diagram of these disciplines mostly involves the overlap: Which is the moment-to-moment choice of living from a place of love: A place of authentic wholeness and integrity.


Ram Dass, the Harvard psychiatrist, said that "Pain is the (ego) mind. It's the thoughts of the mind. Then I get rid of the thoughts, and I get in my witness, which is down in my spiritual heart. The witness that witnesses BEing. Then those particular thoughts that are painful - love them. I love them to death!” I too have found this to be such deep Truth. The key to joy, peace, and love are to never leave the seat of your soul.


Deepak Chopra wrote "The world sometimes feels like an insane asylum. You can decide whether you want to be an inmate or pick up your visitor's badge. You can be in the world but not engage in the melodrama of it; you can become a spiritual being having a human experience thoroughly and fully." Marianne Williamson, the presidential candidate wrote “The spiritual path – is simply the journey of living our lives. Everyone is on a spiritual path; most people just don't know it... To trust in the force that moves the Universe is Faith. Faith isn't blind, it's visionary.” In my own experience the people who are the most successful in recovery are those who walk the spiritual path, without fail.


So, TLC brings together elements of traditional coaching, positive psychology, philosophy (including Stoicism and Existential Philosophy), wellbeing approaches, spirituality, and other timeless Truths to form a unique blend that allows you to step out of your fears and into infinite possibility for every area of your life.


TLC uniquely creates and holds the space for you to see your Self afresh, with clarity, and step into new limitless ways of BEing, which will transform how you intuitively create your world. Create from the heart. My work is to guide you to raise your own conscious awareness to the level that you want to achieve, without the fears that are holding you back.


Deepak Chopra wrote “Enlightened leadership is spiritual if we understand spirituality not as some kind of religious dogma or ideology but as the domain of awareness where we experience values like Truth, goodness, beauty, love and compassion, and also intuition, creativity, insight and focused attention.” Amen to those.


Dr Edward Bach wrote "Disease is, in essence, the result of conflict between soul and mind (ego), and will never be eradicated except by spiritual and mental effort." We are all working towards our own mental health. Lack of unconditional love causes most mental and emotional illnesses. It’s not by chance that the word evolve contains the word love in it. The mind is the dwelling place of ego, and the heart is the dwelling place of the soul. You can feel it can't you?


Embarking on a spiritual journey entails stepping into the labyrinth of Self-discovery and consciousness. On this path, the wisdom of revered Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung can serve as a beacon of light. From understanding your unconscious, embracing your authentic Self, and acknowledging your relationship with the infinite, these words of wisdom from the legend that is Carl Jung will provide invaluable insights to guide your spiritual journey: "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate... The world is changing, and I’m on the transition team. Awaken and shine your light for others to follow. The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are... The decisive question for man is: Is he related to something infinite or not?.. The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being... People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own souls. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious... There is no coming to consciousness without pain." When asked if he believed in the existence of God, Carl Jung replied "I don't believe, I know." Yes, he was one of the leading psychiatrists of all time. The point of life is to create who and what you are, and then to experience that. Then Nature heals, you receive the Grace of God, and, as Amy Winehouse sang in her album 'Back to Black', "Tears dry on their own."


Gabor Maté wrote “Much of what we call personality is not a fixed set of traits, only coping mechanisms a person acquired in childhood.” This is the basis of compassion.


I am here. I see you. I hear you. There is nothing to fear, and nothing to be ashamed of. I have total compassion for you. I will never judge you. I will see the highest version of you until you see it for your Self. Let me be your guide.


Namaste.


Sending you love, light, and blessings brothers.


Olly



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Hello,

I am delighted and enchanted to meet you. I coach men with 'Deep Coaching', 'Supercoaching', and Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). Thank you for reading this far. I very much look forward to connecting with the highest version of you, to seeing your highest possibility, and to our conversations. Please do contact me via my email for a free connection call and a free experience of coaching on Zoom or in person. 


“Transformative life coaching uniquely creates and holds the space for you to see your self afresh, with clarity, and step into new ways of BEing, which will transform how you perceive and intuitively create your world. My work is to guide you to raise your own conscious awareness to the level that you want to achieve.”







Click here for the books that I know will help you along your journey of recovering your Self:









I have a Bachelor's degree in Natural Sciences from Trinity College, Cambridge; a Master's Degree in Philosophy from Trinity College, Cambridge; a PhD Doctorate in Scientific Research from University College London (UCL); a Medical Degree (MD/MBBS) from The Royal Free Hospital School of Medicine, London and have been a doctor and reconstructive trauma and cancer surgeon in London for 20 years. I have a number of other higher qualifications in science and surgery. I have published over 50 peer reviewed PubMed cited scientific journal articles, have been an associate editor and frequent scientific faculty member, and am the author of several scientific books. I have been awarded my Diploma in Transformative Life Coaching in London, which has International Coaching Federation (ICF) Accreditation, as well as the UK Association for Coaching (AC), and the European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC). I have been on my own transformative journey full time for over five years and I am ready to be your guide to you finding out who you really are and how the world works.




Please let me know if you would like to join our 'VOICE for men' VIP community: 'Vulnerability & Openness Is a Choice Ensemble', 'Visibility Is Power', where men can find their strength, courage, and authenticity, by dropping their egocentric fears and instead communicate openly with vulnerability. We are co-creating this space. It will change your life. It will empower you. This community is a safe space for men to connect and discuss philosophy, spirituality, positive psychology, awakening to Self-realisation, wisdom and timeless Truths, to share our experience, strength and hope, and to find solutions to our pain and fears. Our meeting is free to join. There is no script, just sharing.




 
 
 

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