Your Higher Power is also called your soul, your real Self, your true Self, or your Higher Self. This is who you truly are. Anne Sexton said "Love your self's Self where it lives." We need a soul-led world not a soul-less world.
The stream of thoughts (the so-called ‘ stream of consciousness’) of the conscious self, the ego, is shallow and not very wide. Our totality (our subconscious Self plus our conscious self) is much greater. St. Augustine wrote “I cannot grasp all that I am.” Such humility and wisdom!
Sandra Hochman said "What I wanted, was to be my Self again."
Are you (also called your false self, your fake self, or your ego - who you think you are, but are in fact not) struggling with pain or fear right now? Pain is the dwelling place of the ego. Fear is the language of the ego. Do you feel as though your life is spinning out of control? Are you feeling overwhelmed, anxious and depressed? Do you feel like you are drowning? Do you read a lot of 'self-help' books but find that they are not helping? Are you hooked on social media? Are you addicted to external validation? Are you craving 'imitation love' and instant substitute gratification?
Adult cravings can never satisfy infantile unmet needs (unconditional love) and our experience of childhood and adolescence creates a false identity (the ego). Instead of primal needs being satisfied we experience primal pain. Until we feel it, learn from it, and let it go, we will continue to act from a subconscious place - we are asleep to life. As Carl Gustav Jung (the most famous psychiatrist of all time, who was also a spiritual Master) wrote "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become. You are what you do, not what you say you'll do." You are not alone. We are all doing it all wrong.
Our current Western 'civilisation' is encouraging us to be self-obsessed and to aspire to goals that do not originate from our souls. This is at the core of your pain, your fear, and your destructive conflict-seeking behaviour. The answer to all your problems may be very simple: You just need to let go of the illusion that you are in control. This is the key to healing from pain, fear, and self-obsession, as well as being the foundation for Self-realisation and Enlightenment.
In the Bible in Romans 13:1 it states “Let every soul be subject unto the Higher Powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.“ What if you are you an atheist or agnostic? There is a secular alternative to your Higher Power: Spirituality.
In either case, it's time to invoke your 'God Mode'. As the Bible says in Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God." This is a call to meditation, which unifies your psyche. When the unity of Self is divided or fractured we are anxious, unhappy, and vulnerable. The repair of inner divisions is essential to wellbeing according to all psychotherapy schools. The integration of our selves is a lifelong process.
Carl Gustav Jung, the world-leading psychiatrist and spiritual Master, wrote "In each of us there is another whom we do not know. He speaks to us in dreams and tells us how differently he sees us from the way we see ourselves. When, therefore, we find ourselves in a difficult situation to which there is no solution, he can sometimes kindle a light that radically alters our attitude - the very attitude that led us into the difficult situation."
What's stopping you from having a spiritual experience? Your ego? Are you stuck on the idea of God? You don't need to believe in God to heal and recover, you just need to stop believing that you are God...
What are you reaching for?
Pain and fear
Pain and fear may originate from your inability to exert control over your life. In recovery from mental illness and addiction there is one thing that underlies all of your problems: Your ego.
Knowledge and understanding alone do not lead us out of pain into a new life. If that were the case, psychiatrists and psychologists would have better success rates in healing us. I don't deny that they are useful disciplines: I assert that they might not be enough for you. They are simply tools, not a tool kit, or tool box. They are metaphors that approximate Truth but are not the Truth in themselves. You need wisdom, Truth, and an individualised, tailored, healing journey. I know: I have been where you are right now. You need a guide: An Enlightened Witness.
So what is the source of our success in finding our paths? It's our ability to follow our Higher Power's cues. It's being tuned in enough to feel and act on the opportunities that our Higher Power presents to us each day. What comes from the soul originates from our Higher Power. Let us follow the prompting of our soul, so we may better learn what it means to live in the realm of our Higher Power. Abundance in life is the result of acknowledging our Higher Power and applying what we learn from it. How well do you express the prompting of your soul?
Your mind is all you have
Sam Harris, the renowned philosopher and neuroscientist, wrote in his book 'Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion' that "A human mind is a wandering mind, and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind... This is not to say that external circumstances do not matter. But it is your mind, rather than circumstances themselves, that determines the quality of your life. Your mind is the basis of everything you experience... Our minds are all we have. They are all we have ever had. And they are all we can offer others. This might not be obvious, especially when there are aspects of your life that seem in need of improvement - when your goals are unrealised, or you are struggling to find a career, or you have relationships that need repairing. But it’s the Truth. Every experience you have ever had has been shaped by your mind. Every relationship is as good or as bad as it is because of the minds involved. If you are perpetually angry, depressed, confused, and unloving, or your attention is elsewhere, it won’t matter how successful you become or who is in your life - you won’t enjoy any of it... My mind begins to seem like a video game: I can either play it intelligently, learning more in each round, or I can be killed in the same spot by the same monster, again and again... Some people are content in the midst of deprivation and danger, while others are miserable despite having all the luck in the world. This is not to say that external circumstances do not matter. But it is your mind, rather than circumstances themselves, that determines the quality of your life. Your mind is the basis of everything you experience and of every contribution you make to the lives of others. Given this fact, it makes sense to train it... How we pay attention to the present moment largely determines the character of our experience and, therefore, the quality of our lives. Mystics and contemplatives have made this claim for ages - but a growing body of scientific research now bears it out... Every moment of the day - indeed, every moment throughout one’s life - offers an opportunity to be relaxed and responsive or to suffer unnecessarily... The reality of your life is always now. And to realise this, we will see, is liberating. In fact, I think there is nothing more important to understand if you want to be happy in this world... If you are thinking without knowing you are thinking, you are confused about who and what you are... I still considered the world’s religions to be mere intellectual ruins, maintained at enormous economic and social cost, but I now understood that important psychological Truths could be found in the rubble."
You live your life as two people - either as ego or as your Higher Power: In the same way as does a werewolf or Dr Jekyll and and Mr Hyde. Who you are is your choice. It's a daily choice every morning. Your Higher Power is your adult assertive self: In other words, the real you. The internet and social media allow people to dissociate their false selves from reality. They can live in a virtual world entirely as their ego: Their fake self. Studies show that two thirds of people spend 45 minutes editing their posted images on social media to meet their own ego 'ideals'. The person in the photo doesn’t even look like the person in the photo. The photos do not look real. This way of being can actually lead to dissociative personality disorder. This can leave a false self, which is only a mask, enveloped in psychosis. The way they perceive themselves is completely different to how others perceive them. They lose all authenticity. R.D. Laing wrote the book 'The Divided Self: An Existential Study in Sanity and Madness.' He developed the concept of ontological insecurity. Ontological refers to BEing. His watershed work aimed to make madness comprehensible, and in doing so revolutionised the way we perceive mental illness. Using case studies of patients he had worked with, psychiatrist R.D. Laing argued that psychosis is not a medical condition, but an outcome of the 'divided self', or the tension between the two personas within us: one our authentic, private identity (our Higher Power), and the other the false, 'sane' (but actually crazy) self that we present to the world (the ego). Laing was one of the twentieth century's most influential psychotherapists. This theory is entirely compatible with Carl Jung's findings. The ego makes a great servant and a terrible and crazy Master.
This is not pop-psychology. This is hard fact. Functional MRI scanners show different patterns of brain activity in people who are BEing authentic or inauthentic.
Sam Harris wrote "We are all seeking fulfilment while living at the mercy of changing experience. Whatever we acquire in life gets dispersed. Our bodies age. Our relationships fall away. Even the most intense pleasures last only a few moments. And every morning, we are chased out of bed by our thoughts." Those thoughts are fearful: Fear is the language of the ego.
Your ego is your petrified 7-year-old self who is trying to run your life from a place of fear and pain. To heal we have to let go of our ego - the 'little me', the 'King baby', or the “I, me, 'mine'” in your life. The ego is an illusion. The ego is simply self-will run riot: It is self-obsessed and self-destructive.
Sam Harris wrote "We grasp at transitory pleasures. We brood about the past and worry about the future. We continually seek to prop up and defend an egoic self that doesn’t exist." It might be time to let go of your ego. Holding on to your ego is like holding a hand-grenade with the pin pulled out, or playing Russian roulette: Just watch the 'Deer Hunter' scene about Russian roulette if you want to know what it's like to try to survive life in fear (reacting - Christopher Walken) rather than from a place of relative serenity (responding - Robert de Niro).
Trigger alert: This is not an easy watch. Compare and contrast the two ways of BEing in 'The Deer Hunter': Robert de Niro (responding from a place of calm) and Christopher Walken (reacting from fear)
Plato said "When the mind (the ego) is thinking it is talking to itself." When you are letting your conditioned thoughts rule your mind you are in ego-mode, and therefore behind enemy lines (the ego is not you!) He continued "For a man to conquer himself (his ego) is the first and noblest of all victories."
Higher power
Ninety percent of your mind is subconscious. It is in the subconscious mind that all your true power lies, with infinite potential and possibility. 12-step recovery groups, modelled on the A.A. programme that was developed by Bill Wilson almost a century ago in 1935, have found that people can only recover if they connect with a Higher Power, have a spiritual experience, drop out of ego on a daily basis, and serve others in doing the same. Alcoholics and other types of addicts are no different to anyone else: They have just found a low-spirit solution (that doesn't work - so it's not actually a solution) to a high-spirit problem. Other people, who haven't found any kind of solution, are just restless, irritable, discontent, angry or hateful.
Our relationship and our journey into Nature, the Universe, or God is indeed a personal one. It does not need to be consistent with the definition of any established religious institution or the experience of any other person. In fact, we don't have to define our Higher Power even for ourselves.
Jesus said, according to Mathew 28:20, that "Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen." The still quiet voice within is speaking to you right now and in every moment. This is the voice of your Higher Power.
To some of us it may seem that spirituality is out of reach when we begin our Hero's Journey to wellbeing. Maybe we never knew a Higher Power. Many of us grow up with an idea of God imposed upon us. This world is filled with so many different interpretations of a Higher Power. There is no reason why each of us cannot have our own concept.
I realised part of my resistance to turning over my life and my will was that I had superimposed my mother onto God. I did not want a version of a Higher Power that I could never live up to or never please, and who loved me conditionally. I had to say goodbye to her. When I could separate my view of my mother from my concept of God, I got a sense that there is a more unconditionally loving, giving and tolerant power in the Universe; that's the Higher Power that I build a relationship with today.
As Sam Harris wrote “Merely accepting that we are lazy, distracted, petty, easily provoked to anger, and inclined to waste our time in ways that we will later regret is not a path to happiness.” I think by the word happiness that he really means joy.
“Spiritus contra spiritum”, which was used by Carl Jung in a letter to Bill Wilson, literally translates to “spirit against spirit”. Loosely translated, it refers to “A spiritual experience to counter addiction to the spirits (alcoholism).” Spiritus in Latin means both alcoholic beverages, i.e., spirits, and the highest religious experience. In relating this simple phrase, Jung confirmed for Bill that the A.A. program aimed at spiritual development and a spiritual awakening, as treatment for alcoholism, was the correct direction. The basis of 12 step recovery programmes is just letting go of the illusion of control. The ego is destructive to Self and others.
But what do you do if you are an atheist or an agnostic? The answer is that your Higher Power does not have to be God. A higher power simply means the process of deidentifying with your false ego, which is is trying to control the Universe through your self will run riot. Alfred Lord Tennyson, Queen Victoria’s Poet Laureate, wrote "Ring out the false, ring in the true."
In his brilliant book 'Waking Up' Sam Harris explains this process and how it relates to mental illness, addiction recovery, personal growth, and Self-realisation. You don't need to believe in God to heal and recover, you just need to stop believing that you are God. We are all foot soldiers, not the general in the community that is the human race.
Psychotherapist Mike Stroh and Political Science Professor David Zarnett explore the thought-provoking ideas of renowned philosopher and neuroscientist Sam Harris and uncover a fresh perspective on Higher Power, mental illness, addiction recovery, personal growth, and Self-realisation
The space that is created inside of us when we let go of our ego allows our psyche to reidentify with the part of us that is not trying to control the Universe. This is a good idea, as we simply cannot win in any battle against the Universe. Thinking that you can is an illusion, and is holding you back from your true power: The Truth that you are one with the Universe, and not separate to it. In John 10:30 Jesus said "I and the Father are one.” Ego is an acronym for 'Edging God Out'. Invite her, him, or them back in.
A Higher Power is anything that is greater than your ego, which is pretty much anything. It can be your family, your community, love (another name for God), Jesus, God, or simply the sense of awe that is the experience of Nature, the Universe, or Truth. My Higher Power is Jesus, as he was a human being who had infinite potential, showing us that we all do once we drop our fears. Prayer and meditation are your superpowers. They are the only atomic habits that you really need. They increase our conscious contact with our Higher Power. Jesus never came from a place of fear, only love. He never came from ego: He was always his higher Self. That's the only difference between him and us. But it needn't be.
'Self-help' is a misnomer. 'Self-help' is the problem, not the solution! 'Self-help' is exactly what we shouldn’t do. The whole problem is that there is too much self and not enough Self.
When you choose to be and make all choices from your Higher Power, a place of love, you will become as new. It says in the Bible 2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new."
Atheism and agnosticism
Atheism and agnosticism is just the ego getting in the way of a spiritual experience. Spirituality does not mean God or religion. A spiritual experience simply means waking up to reality and Truth.
As Sam Harris wrote "Spirituality must be distinguished from religion - because people of every Faith, and of none, have had the same sorts of spiritual experiences... Atheism is not a philosophy; it is not even a view of the world; it is simply a refusal to deny the obvious. Unfortunately, we live in a world in which the obvious is overlooked as a matter of principle... One could surely argue that the Buddhist tradition, taken as a whole, represents the richest source of contemplative wisdom that any civilisation has produced."
Conclusions
We feel the need to control the Universe as we are in pain and fear. This is the human condition. We have our parents and society to thank for that conditioning. But we cannot blame them: That wouldn't help us or them.
The answer to the question in the title of this article "Do you need a Higher Power?" is simply yes, if you want to get well and recover. A power greater than your self is just not your self-will. You have tried that and it didn't work. I know as it doesn't work for anyone. The process is one of deidentfying with your illusory false self (your ego) and reidentifying with the part of you that is not trying to control the Universe. This simply means to stop being self-obsessed. This allows you to turn your life to the service of others. This is the only way to achieve anything of lasting significance. This is the only way to be truly abundant.
Healing is the emergence of other parts of your Self through the space that is created when you stop identifying with the ego, which is just self will. Healing occurs when we identify with the parts of our Selves that are not trying to control the Universe. Healing and recovery are all about just about letting go of control, and surrendering to the Universe. Letting go and getting guidance from the Universe doesn’t make us vulnerable: It makes us powerful. That is real power. As Hagberg described there are six levels of personal power. Ego stops at level three. Hardly the pentouse.
It is by turning ourselves over to the service of others that we find our true Selves. Service is the process of becoming who you really are. That is the will of the Universe. It's also the way out of your self-obsession. I am sure that your friends will be glad too! Sam Harris wrote "You can learn something about a person by the company she keeps." Stop trying to fix, judge, criticise, and project onto others: You can't anyway and they will run away as fast as they can from you. Sam Harris wrote “It may not be coincidental that you use phrases like ‘self conscious’ when you really mean that you are conscious of others being conscious of you.” You have much inner work to do. It is by cleaning up your own house that you will serve. The question is? Do you want to? As Morpheus says to Neo in the iconic film 'The Matrix' "I'm trying to free your mind, Neo. But I can only show you the door. You're the one that has to walk through it." Are you ready?
My gift is to be your guide. Let me know if you would like to continue this conversation...
Email me: hello@transformativelifecoach.co.uk
“Transformative life coaching uniquely creates and holds the space for you to see your self afresh, with clarity, and step into new ways of BEing, which will transform how you perceive and intuitively create your world. My work is to guide you to raise your own conscious awareness to the level that you want to achieve.” Olly Alexander Branford
My coaching themes and services - I work 1:1 and in groups with men who are looking for: Transformative Life Coaching, Transformational Coaching, Life Coaching, Personal Coaching, Positive Psychology Coaching, Recovery Coaching, Trauma Informed Coaching, Work Addiction Coaching, Workaholism Coaching, Addiction Coaching, Mindfulness Coaching.
Click here to read all my articles:
Suggested reading
Click here for the books that I know will help you along your journey of recovering your Self:
Hello,
I am very pleased to meet you. Thank you for reading this far. I very much look forward to connecting with the highest version of you, to seeing your highest possibility, and to our conversations. Please do contact me via my website for a free connection call and a free experience of coaching. I am here to serve you.
See you soon,
Olly Alexander Branford MBBS, MA(Cantab), PhD
Please let me know if you would like to join our 'VOICE for men' group: 'Vulnerability & Openness Is a Choice Ensemble', where you can find your strength, courage, and authenticity, by dropping your egocentric fears and instead communicate openly with vulnerability. We are co-creating this space. It will change your life. It will empower you. This community is a safe space for men to connect and discuss philosophy, spirituality, positive psychology, awakening to Self-realisation, wisdom and timeless Truths, to share our experience, strength and hope, and to find solutions to our pain and fears. Our meeting is free to join. There is no script, just sharing. Click here to read my article on 'VOICE for men' to find out more:
Email me: hello@transformativelifecoach.co.uk
Click here for my glossary:
Click here for my website:
Click me to contact me:
Click here for my free eBook all about Enlightenment:
Click here for my LinkedIn profile:
Click here for my Medium articles:
I have a Bachelor's degree in Natural Sciences from Trinity College, Cambridge; a Master's Degree in Philosophy from Trinity College, Cambridge; a PhD Doctorate in Scientific Research from University College London (UCL); a Medical Degree (MD/MBBS) from The Royal Free Hospital School of Medicine, London and have been a doctor and reconstructive trauma and cancer surgeon in London for 20 years. I have published over 50 peer reviewed scientific journal articles, have been an associate editor and frequent scientific faculty member, and am the author of several scientific books. I have been awarded my Diploma in Transformative Life Coaching in London, which has International Coaching Federation (ICF) Accreditation, as well as the UK Association for Coaching (AC), and the European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC). I have been on my own transformative journey full time for four years and I am ready to be your guide to you finding out who you really are and how the world works.