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My Search For Meaning

Updated: Jan 28

Despite many millennia of civilisation, I have not read a satisfactory answer to the question “What is the meaning of life?” There still seems to be much debate and no firm consensus.


Is this because there is no answer? I refuse to believe that this is the case.


Is it then, that there is no Universal answer, and so everyone must find their own answer?


Is it because no-one is looking for an answer anymore?


I was determined to find an answer, and my experience during these last four years of hardship, challenges, obstacles, suffering, recovery, healing, passing through The Dark Night of The Soul, and taking the Hero’s Journey that have led to my looking inwards and a spiritual awakening (along with reading a few hundred books) have led me to formulate an answer. Is it possible to put this answer into words? Let’s dive in and see shall we?..


My search for meaning

 

What is the meaning of life?

The meaning of life is related to your mission in life. Viktor Frankl, the psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, said “You don’t create your mission in life - you detect it.” It's a discovery, an unfolding of who you are. He continued "Striving to find meaning in one’s life is the primary motivational force in man." You have a calling - a purpose: A reason to BE. Can you hear it yet? It’s the quiet voice. You know, the one that you hear, but choose to ignore, because of that brash egocentric voice that is so loud and full of fear, which seems to drown everything out. Joseph Campbell, who described the Hero's Journey, said “The privilege of a lifetime is BEing who you are.”


You don’t need to take a pilgrimage to a far-off place to find your purpose: You simply need to become more present to where you are.


Your purpose is bigger than your ego. Your ego will never see the golden thread that runs through your entire life as your purpose. Your purpose is larger than you. It is part of a bigger picture. That’s why your ego doesn’t like it! You are ultimately part of a cosmic-sized love. Only love will change the world. Only love is real. You just don’t see it yet.


It’s an epic journey from looking for your purpose to living it. Isn’t it time to express your soul’s immensity? To recognise your true voice, to find rest in the sanctuary of your soul, to follow the golden thread of wisdom, purpose, and meaning in your life. In other words, to step into your Higher Self. Is it as easy as that? The Dark Night of The Soul and the Hero's Journey are not for the faint-hearted. There will be challenges, there will be suffering before you rise again.


Friedrich Nietzsche wrote "To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.” So, it is in the darkness and tumultuous turbulence that we find our meaning?


Viktor Frankl was a Holocaust survivor who spent three years in Auschwitz and other concentration camps between 1942 and 1945. His first wife, Tilly Grosser, and his mother, father, and brother were all murdered in the camps. In ‘Man's Search for Meaning’, Frankl shared a "Fragment"- as he called it - of his experiences living in that Hell. To survive those three terrible years, he found it was "Essential to keep practicing the art of living" even

in the face of death. He sought inspiration from the Psalms. He repeated daily this line from Psalm 118: “I called to the Lord from my narrow prison, and He answered me in the freedom of space.“


During his time at Auschwitz, Viktor Frankl found a "Living question" that helped him survive the horrors of the camps and that later inspired his life's work. "The question which beset me was, 'Has all this suffering, this dying around us, a meaning?'" he wrote." Frankl deduced that if the answer was no, then that must mean survival had no meaning either. This didn't feel true to Frankl. He recognised that 'No' was the voice of despair, which he described as "Suffering without meaning." Frankl said yes to his life, and a deeper meaning and purpose to his life were revealed to him. Frankl argued that we always have the freedom to find meaning in life through meaningful attitudes even in apparently meaningless situations. He said “If there is meaning in life at all, then there must be a meaning in suffering. Suffering is an ineradicable part of life, even as fate and death. Without suffering and death human life cannot be complete.” Frankl famously said “The last of the human freedoms: To choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way. And there were always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very Self, your inner freedom; which determined whether or not you become the plaything to circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity.”

 

Our suffering appears to be a key ingredient in finding the meaning of life. Sigmund Freud wrote that “One day in retrospect the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.” Albert Einstein agreed, saying “There is only one road to human greatness: Through the school of hard knocks.” Have you had yours yet? Oprah Winfrey wrote “Challenges are gifts that force us to search for a new centre of gravity. Don’t fight them. Just find a new way to stand.” Maya Angelou reminds us that the caterpillar literally has to dissolve to become a butterfly “We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.”

 

Viktor Frankl was the founder of a new school of existential therapy called logotherapy, heralded as the third Viennese school of psychotherapy, after those of Sigmund Freud and Alfred Adler. "According to logotherapy, this striving to find a meaning in one's life is the primary motivational force in man," wrote Victor Frankl. Logotherapy's main aim is to help you live a meaning-centred life. The will to meaning, named by Frankl, is more than just a secondary rationalisation to the will to pleasure (Freud's theory) and the will to power (Adler's theory). The will to meaning comes first. Nine months after Viktor Frankl was liberated from the Nazi concentration camps, he gave a short series of lectures called "Yes to Life in Spite of Everything" at an adult education college in Vienna. He taught that your will to meaning is a sacred YES that connects you with a higher purpose that is far more meaningful than the pursuit of power and superiority over others. The will to meaning also engages a Higher Power that can help you overcome the wounding and suffering you experience on your path. I believe that it's your will to meaning that activates the God-seed and invokes your God-mode in you and enables you to realise your soul's immensity. Viktor Frankl said it this way: "Logotherapy sees the human patient in all his humanness. I step up to the core of the patient's BEing. And that is a being in search of meaning, a being that is transcending himself, a BEing capable of acting in love for others."


What according to Frankl are the three main ways to find meaning in life? Logotherapy gives us three different paths for finding meaning in life:

•            By performing a deed or creating something – taking action.

•            By coming into contact with someone or experiencing something.

•            By experiencing unavoidable suffering, and the attitude we take toward it.

 

Freddie Frankl (Viktor’s nephew) said that to achieve greater meaning and purpose in life you need to “Suffer well, love well, and work well.” If you learn to suffer well, you can learn from your suffering, you can grow through it, and ultimately, you are liberated from it. You can use your suffering to experience a greater connection with life, to enjoy deeper and more meaningful relationships, and to continue to step into your soul's immensity. How is this even possible? It is not possible without love. Viktor Frankl recognised love as a Higher Power that lives in the "Innermost core" of your BEing. He taught that when you meet suffering with enough love, you can find a meaning for it that helps you to survive and grow. Love has the power to give meaning to your life and it can use your suffering for a higher purpose. Of course, it's impossible to do this on your own. We all need help, and we are here to play a part in each other's healing and liberation. Loving ourselves and each other is our salvation and our shared purpose. This is why we need compassionate guides and Enlightened Witnesses in our quest for meaning.


Viktor Frankl observed that "Ever more people today have the means to live but no meaning to live for." Why do we go to work? What is the real meaning of work? Do we work simply to earn money and acquire wealth, or is there a higher purpose to it?


Eckhart Tolle wrote “You are present when what you are doing is not primarily a means to an end (money, prestige, winning) but fulfilling in itself, when there is joy and aliveness in what you do.”


Abraham Maslow wrote “In any given moment we have two options: To step forward into love, openness, and growth or step back into contraction, fear and safety.” The choice is up to you.


In the Athlete Stage and Warrior Stage of Carl Jung's work, we mainly use work to win medals, climb a ladder, earn a promotion, and rise to the top, but it's never enough. You may end up burying yourself in your work in an effort to avoid your suffering and to compensate for the lack of love in your life. Freddie Frankl wrote "The purpose of life is to work out what the real work of your life is." Your real work is far greater than learning a trade, having a job, pursuing a career, getting published, being the boss, or owning your business. Yes, it may include some of that, but beyond that, the real work of your life is more about who you are, what you stand for, how you meet your suffering, and how you choose to express your love. It was time for me to trust that I carried the answer to my own questions. And that it was time for me to start living some of those answers.


I knew instinctively that it was something to do with love. Marianne Williamson, the American Presidential candidate, and author of ‘A Return to love’, wrote "Love is the essential reality and our purpose on Earth. To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life. Meaning does not lie in things. Meaning lies in us." The soul craves meaning the way the body craves oxygen. She continued "As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others." Williamson argued that we might "Only do what you feel called in your heart to do, and then give all of yourself to the task… There is nothing Enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do." She reminds us not to wait for a purpose "Maturity includes the recognition that no one is going to see anything in us that we don't see in ourselves. Stop waiting for a producer. Produce yourself."

 

Epictetus wrote “It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters… The world turns aside to let any man pass who knows where he is going.” The clarion call, as Epictetus states is that “There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power or our will. It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters. First say to yourself what you would BE; and then do what you have to do.”

 

Anthony De Mello wrote “As soon as you look at the world through an ideology you are finished. No reality fits an ideology. Life is beyond that… That is why people are always searching for a meaning to life… Meaning is only found when you go beyond meaning. Life only makes sense when you perceive it as mystery and it makes no sense to the conceptualising mind.”

 

The ‘special sauce’ that brings zest to your life is love and to love what you do. Ryan Gosling said “I’ve learned it’s important not to limit yourself. You can do whatever you really love to do, no matter what it is.” Deepak Chopra echoed “You must find the place inside yourself where nothing is impossible.”


Brené Brown wrote in 'Rising Strong' “I want to be in the arena. I want to be brave with my life. And when we make the choice to dare greatly, we sign up to get our asses kicked. We can choose courage or we can choose comfort, but we can’t have both. Not at the same time.” Michael Jordan said “Fear is an illusion. You think something is standing in your way, but nothing is really there. What is there is an opportunity to do your best and gain some success.” Rosa Parks wrote “I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.”

 

Why is there no answer to the question concerning the meaning of life?

Your wounds contain your wisdom and your higher purpose: The meaning of your life. But we must be prepared to face those wounds. Ram Dass, the Harvard clinical psychologist turned spiritual guru, wrote “I'm explicitly making my life a teaching by expressing the lessons I've learned so it becomes a map for other people. Everybody's life can be like that if they choose to make it so, choosing to reflect on what they've been through and share it with others.”


Elisabeth Kubler-Ross wrote that “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”


Eckhart Tolle wrote “Whenever anything negative happens to you, there is a deep lesson concealed within it, although you may not see it at the time.”


Life is an illusion until we can see clearly. When we wake up to the illusion, we realise that we have built an entire ego-system based around who we’ve been told we are, but it’s false: It's a mask. Slowly, you detach from your roles, realising that everyone is cut from the same consciousness. Then you truly begin to see through the lens of love.


Not many are prepared to face the wounds and suffering that we need to face to get to the meaning of our lives. The test then for all of us is how we respond to the suffering in our lives. It is never too late to be what you might have been...

 

Albert Camus, a main protagonist of Existentialism, wrote that “Man is the only creature who refuses to be what he is.” He asks us to “Live to the point of tears”, reminding us that “There is scarcely any passion without struggle.” Emotion plays a role: Camus states that “I know that man is capable of great deeds. But if he isn't capable of great emotion, well, he leaves me cold.” I know for sure that our journey is one to come out of our minds and into our hearts, where true wisdom rests.


Camus continued “The absurd is born of the encounter between two opposed concepts: The human need for meaning and the apparent meaninglessness of the Universe.” This is one of the most insightful Albert Camus quotes. The quote describes absurdism, the idea that life is absurd and irrational. Absurdism says that humans want meaning and value in life, but the Universe does not give any. The material Universe is full of chaos and conflict that humans feel obliged to propagate, yet they cannot understand. Absurdism says that life has no meaning or value in itself, but humans can make their meaning and value through their choices and actions.

 

What have other people said about the meaning of life or what advice have they given about finding it?


William Shakespeare wrote in ‘All’s Well That Ends Well’ “Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.”

 

Friedrich Schlegel “Life is writing. The sole purpose of mankind is to engrave the thoughts of divinity onto the tablets of Nature.” I wholeheartedly agree with this, regardless of the form in which that ‘writing’ takes.


Ludwig Wittgenstein wrote “To believe in a God means to understand the question about the meaning of life. To believe in a God means to see that the facts of the world are not the end of the matter. To believe in God means to see that life has a meaning.”


Leo Tolstoy wrote “If you do not know your place in the world and the meaning of your life, you should know there is something to blame; and it is not the social system, or your intellect, but the way in which you have directed your intellect… It seems that it is impossible to live without discovering the purpose of your life. And the first thing which a person should do is to understand the meaning of life. But the majority of people who consider themselves to be educated are proud that they have reached such great height that they cease to care about the meaning of existence… For man to be able to live he must either not see the infinite (and remain asleep, like taking the 'Blue pill' in 'The Matrix), or have such an explanation of the meaning of life as will connect the finite with the infinite (taking the 'Red pill' and waking up).”


Pope John Paul II wrote “When you wonder about the mystery of yourself, look to Christ who gives you the meaning of life. When you wonder what it means to be a mature person, look to Christ who is the fullness of humanity. And when you wonder about your role in the future of the world and of the United States, look to Christ.” Christ was a human BEing of pure love. That is what he taught us. That is where we should look.


A Sanskrit Scholar, J.W. Hauer, speaking of the central message of the 'Gita' says, "We are not called to solve the meaning of life, but to find out the deed demanded by us and to work, and so by action to master the riddle of life." Work is love in action. Find out what your purpose is and do that, with all your heart.


Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life gave a perfectly worded way forwards:

Chairman: Item six on the agenda, the Meaning of Life. Now Harry, you’ve had some thoughts on this.

Harry: That’s right, yeah. I’ve had a team working on this over the past few weeks, and what we’ve come up with can be reduced to two fundamental concepts. One, people are not wearing enough hats. Two, matter is energy. In the Universe there are many energy fields which we cannot normally perceive. Some energies have a spiritual source which act upon a person’s soul. However, this soul does not exist ab initio as orthodox Christianity teaches; it has to be brought into existence by a process of guided self-observation. However, this is rarely achieved owing to man’s unique ability to be distracted from spiritual matters by everyday trivia.

[Pause.]

Max: What was that about hats?


Abraham Maslow, who devised his ‘Hierarchy of Needs’, ultimately leading to Self-realisation, wrote “The way to recover the meaning of life and the worthwhileness of life is to recover the power of experience, to have impulse voices from within, and to be able to hear these impulse voices from within - and make the point: This can be done.”


Jane Roberts wrote in in ‘Dreams, Evolution and Value Fulfilment’, Volume One “Many people ask, for example: What is the purpose of my life? Meaning: What am I meant to do? but the purpose of your life, and each life, is in its being. That being may include certain actions, but the acts themselves are only important in that they spring out of the essence of your life, which simply by being is bound to fulfil its purposes.”


Leo Tolstoy warned us against over-intellectualising our approach, saying that “The more we live by our intellect, the less we understand the meaning of life.” This is so true in my experience. People remain stuck in tought as emotion was too painful when they were young. This is one of the consequences of childhood trauma.

 

Oscar Wilde wrote that “The aim of life is self-development. To realise one’s nature perfectly - that is what each of us is here for.” Fyodor Dostoevsky wrote similarly“For the secret of human existence lies not only in living but in knowing what to live for.”


Perhaps our purpose is to serve others. Roy T. Bennett wrote “Learn to light a candle in the darkest moments of someone’s life. Be the light that helps others see; it is what gives life its deepest significance.” Leo Tolstoy echoed “The sole meaning of life is to serve humanity.” Marc Chagall wrote “In our life there is a single colour, as on an artist's palette, which provides the meaning of life and art. It is the colour of love.” Marianne Williamson concurred “Nothing liberates our greatness like the desire to help, the desire to serve.” Johanna Paungger wrote that “The only purpose of our lives consists in waking each other up and being there for each other.” The Dalai Lama wrote “Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” Lewis Caroll wrote “One of the deep secrets of life is that all that is really worth the doing, is what we do for others.”

 

Eckhart Tolle wrote in ‘A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose' “Whenever you become anxious or stressed, outer purpose has taken over, and you lost sight of your inner purpose. You have forgotten that your state of consciousness is primary, all else secondary.” Robert Byrne added that “The purpose of life is a life of purpose.”


Action seems to hold a key. Especially action with Faith and without fear. Leap and the net, or wings, will appear. Ray Bradbury wrote “We have to continually be jumping off cliffs and developing our wings on the way down.” We have to close the door behind us before the one ahead of us will be shown to us. As Joseph Campbell wrote “We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” Walt Disney wrote “We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.” Michelle Obama echoed “For me, becoming isn’t about arriving somewhere or achieving a certain aim. I see it instead as forward motion, a means of evolving, a way to reach continuously toward a better Self. The journey doesn’t end.”

 

Perhaps we will only find the meaning of life when we near its end, and it is only then that it will all become clear. Steve Jobs wrote “Believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even when it leads you off the well-worn path and that will make all the difference.”

 

Carl Jung wrote “As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being.”

 

John F. Kennedy wrote “The problems of the world cannot possibly be solved by sceptics or cynics, whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities. We need men who can dream of things that never were, and ask ‘Why not?’” John D. Rockerfeller advises us to be original in our search for meaning “It requires a better type of mind to seek out and to support or to create the new than to follow the worn paths of accepted success.”

 

Oprah Winfrey reminds us “If you don’t know what your passion is, realise that one reason for your existence on Earth is to find it.”

 

Henry Bergson wrote “To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly.”


Emily Dickinson suggests that we seek bliss, writing “Find ecstasy in life; the mere sense of living is joy enough.” But, is it enough for you?

 

Must everyone find their own answer?

Carl Jung wrote “Do not compare, do not measure. No other way is like yours. All other ways deceive and tempt you. You must fulfil the way that is in you. The world will ask you who you are, and if you don't know, the world will tell you.” Jung wrote “The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” Similarly to Frankl, he said that “Embrace your grief. For there, your soul will grow.”


Jung viewed life as being in two halves “Life really does begin at forty. Up until then, you are just doing research… The first half of life is devoted to forming a healthy ego, the second half is going inward and letting go of it.”


Jung wrote in the ‘Red Book’ “Life does not come from events, but from us. Everything that happens outside has already been. Therefore whoever considers the event from outside always sees only that it already was, and that it is always the same. But whoever looks from inside, knows that everything is new. The events that happen are always the same. But the creative depths of man are not always the same. Events signify nothing, they signify only in us. We create the meaning of events. The meaning is and always was artificial. We make it. Because of this we seek in ourselves the meaning of events, so that the way of what is to come becomes apparent and our life can flow again. That which you need comes from your Self, namely the meaning of the event. The meaning of events is not their particular meaning. This meaning exists in learned books. Events have no meaning. The meaning of events is the way of salvation that you create. The meaning of events comes from the possibility of life in this world that you create. It is the mastery of this world and the assertion of your soul in this world. This meaning of events is the supreme meaning, that is not in events, and not in the soul, but is the God standing between events and the soul, the mediator of life, the way, the bridge and the going across.”

 

W. Somerset Maugham wrote that “The secret to life is meaningless unless you discover it your Self.” 'The Wizard of Oz' is such a powerful metaphor. It explains what life on this planet is about. Although Dorothy reaches Oz, she finds she had what she needed - to go back to Kansas all along, but the Good Witch tells her that she had to learn it for her Self. All of the answers to the meaning of life are there, right where we started. The only journey is within.


Barack Obama wrote “Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” Yoko Ono said that “You change the world by being your Self.”

 

Anaïs Nin wrote “There is not one big cosmic meaning for all; there is only the meaning we each give to our life, an individual meaning, an individual plot, like an individual novel, a book for each person.”Do you have a signature meaning to your life?


Is no one looking for an answer anymore?

Perhaps we are too egocentric to find the answer. Albert Einstein wrote “Man can find meaning in life, short and perilous as it is, only through devoting himself to society.” Leo Tolstoy concurred “Grow spiritually and help others to do so. It is the meaning of life.”

Joseph Campbel wrote “People say that what we're all seeking is a meaning for life. I don't think that's what we're really seeking. I think what we're seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our own innermost BEing and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive. That's what it's all finally about.”


Perhaps we are looking in the wrong places. Franco Bassani wrote “Science leads to great achievements, which, quite rightly, fill of joy those who seek the Truth, but if pursued, teaches us that we must seek other sources of ultimate Truth and find answers to existential questions about the meaning of life and the mystery of death."

 

Is BEing the meaning of life?

 

Rasheed Ogunlaru wrote “There are essentially two questions in life – a spiritual question and a material question. The spiritual question is ‘Who am I?’ The material question is ‘What am I to do with my life?’ One leads to the other.”

 

 

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe wrote “One must be something to do something.” Thomas Davidson wrote “Your worth consists in what you are, and not in what you have. What you are will show in what you do.” Robert Louis Stevenson wrote “To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life.”

 

How do you know that you are on the right track?

This is an easy one. The closer you get to the meaning of your life, the more the ego screams with its loud brash voice as it is terrified of dying. For Enlightenment signifies the death of the ego. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe wrote “Difficulties increase the nearer we come to our aim.” Our aim is to dissolve the ego.


It’s a long game, and one which we work on every day of our lives. André Gide wrote that “One doesn’t discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.”

 

What is my answer to what is the meaning of life?

Brené Brown wrote “If you own this story you get to write the ending.” Oprah Winfrey wrote “You define your own life. Don’t let other people write your script.” So, what is my script?

My journey through The Dark Night of The Soul brought meaning through suffering. In taking the Hero’s Journey I realised that my primary, inner purpose was to awaken, and that my secondary, outer purpose was to serve and guide others in doing the same through compassion and presence. The meaning of my life was to achieve these, with my inner and outer purpose being in alignment. This is where I have found my vulnerable yet courageous authenticity. This place takes me to a mindful, meditative state, where I can feel and hear the love, joy, and peace inside me speaking softly to me. The key for me is then to take intuitive action based on my inner voice, and to never get up from the seat of my soul. To do this, I unhook my Self from my conceptualising mind and drop into my heart. This is what inspires me and makes me feel alive, with a sense of wonder like the very first time I remember having seen snow or my first Christmas.


What is the meaning of life for you? Remember that the creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn. I see the highest version of you in you. Let me be your guide on this journey. I know the way...


Speak in such a way that others love to listen to you: Listen in such a way that others love to speak to you.


George Bernard Shaw wrote that “Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” Are you ready to change your mind?


Namaste.


Sending you love, light, and blessings brothers.


Olly



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