top of page
Search

The Power of Presence

Updated: Mar 28

We have a fear of living, whether you know this subconsciously or consciously, you know its true. The solution is presence. Eckhart Tolle wrote ‘The Power of Now’, which is in my ‘Suggested Reading’ list. He pretty much applies presence to every difficult situation and succeeds in bringing peace to your life. Personally, I prefer his book ‘A New Earth: Awakening Your Life's Purpose’, which is also in my ‘Suggested Reading’ list, but both books are life-changing. Ram Dass talked about “Be here, now”, writing books and speaking widely on the subject.


If you are stuck in the past and regret, you will be full of shame and depression. If you are stuck in the future, you will be full of fear and anxiety. If you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future, you will be crapping on your present moment. That’s a fact!


There is so much power in presence. The past is gone. The future doesn't exist, and will become the present, and when it does, you'll be able to handle it.


Henri Nouwen said "Never underestimate the power of your presence"


Presence and freedom from suffering


The key to healing and recovery is meditation. Meditation is incredibly powerful. I meditate twice a day for half an hour. If I am super busy then I meditate for an hour, not less. Meditation drops you into the intuitive voice of your Higher Power, by bringing you into silence, which is when 'God' arrives on a one way ticket to connecting with your BEing, and it also brings you into total presence. It brings you into bliss. Paramahansa Yogananda, the great Indian-American monk and yogi, who was much revered and often cited by Michael Singer, said that meditation is “Entering the laboratory of Soul research.”


If you are facing a difficult situation in the imminent future, then practising presence is the answer. The situation is not happening now. Worrying has absolutely no purpose and keeps you from clarity. You do not need to react, you can pause, relax, and respond, in your own time: Don't be pushed around. Do not worry about the future: That is simply projection. No one knows what will happen tomorrow. Stay grounded in the now. Every spiritual approach and discipline is centred on being present. Worrying is like a chocolate teapot - it serves absolutely no function. Worrying has been described as being like a rocking chair - it takes up your time, but gets you absolutely nowhere, and it isn't even a pleasant distraction.


You do not need to escape. You do not need to seek oblivion. Why are you being distracted from the ecstasy and joy that is your birthright? Stop leaving your divine seat of ease. You are being distracted by your mind. 


Presence and your mind

In most cases, if not all, the quality of your life is not determined by external circumstances but by your own mental dialogue. Your awareness is trapped by thoughts, desires, and past experiences, the resistance to which creates your psyche, which dictate your ability to enjoy life and find peace and joy. The key to freedom and liberation is learning to let go of these mental preferences, rather than trying to manipulate external circumstances to satisfy the mind. Through awareness and conscious practice, you can learn to embrace life's experiences and explore the higher states of your consciousness and BEing.


The more you grow, the deeper you go.


Your mind is telling you that you did everything wrong in the past. That is what makes you human. Everyone does it until they get the concepts and truths in the present article. Your consciousness is distracted by your mind. Your mind is running and ruining your life. It is your mind that determines the quality of your life, not external circumstances; not other people. Why are you not okay? Because of your mind. It distracted you from your sacred  presence and said "Look at this!” You are stuck in the ego mind. It’s time to step into your creative mind. You create from the heart, not the mind.


The vast majority of your thoughts are about you. The mind keeps pulling you back to that place each time you try to leave. This makes your Universe very small. That part of your mind is programmed to have preferences due to past experience for things to happen or not happen. You are holding onto past experiences that will never happen again. The past is over. If you don’t keep it in there then you don’t have to cope with it. There is no story. Stop building the ego mind. Stop trying to make the outside world match your preferences. If you get what you want you get tired of it and you’re afraid of losing it. If you don’t get what you want you are depressed. You just can’t win with that ego mind. This may be alarming to hear, but your ego's ultimate goal is not success or even aggrandisement, it's goal is to kill you.


You are addicted to your mind. Stop worrying about things that have not happened yet. It’s a lose, lose situation. You don’t need to have preferences. You are not the sum of your learned experiences, whatever Freud said, and Carl Jung disagreed with him. Tragically this has infiltrated, and even forms the basis of, psychology. How can those who don't believe in the Soul be expected to heal it? It's a spiritual dis-ease, and needs a spiritual solution. Carl Jung, the greatest psychiatrist of all time, who founded analytical psychology, was a psychotherapist and spiritual grand Master, knew God. The Universe is speaking to you all the time, and to hear it you need to find presence. Slow down, breathe, meditate, and practice mindfulness, which is simply meditation throughout your day. There is science to mindfulness and meditation. You don't need to hustle incessantly to achieve peace and abundance. In fact the opposite is true. For those atheists out there (and I used to be one), spirituality is built on science. Meditation and mindfulness literally rewire your brain. You are not afraid, it's simply your ego mind telling you that you are, as it tries to get you to listen to it, when it is talking nonsense. You are a beautiful, uniquely talented, limitless BEing. The ego mind is an overconfident liar. It's time to dissolve the illusion. It is well with your Soul. Miracles await you. The magic happens when you surrender to the Universe.


The Buddha’s teachings are to accept things as they are. You can handle it. Carl Jung taught that what you resist persists. Practice not storing all this stuff. Start with the low hanging fruit – the easy stuff. You decide what bothers you. You have two options: Let it go or like it. Do you have as your mantra - Amor Fati - love your fate?



Ram Dass reads 'The Third Chinese Patriarch'


Ram Dass reads 'The Third Chinese Patriarch':

The Great Way is not difficult

for those who have no preferences.

When not attached to love or hate,

all is clear and undisguised.

Separate by the smallest amount, however,

and you are as far from it as Heaven is from Earth.


If you wish to know the Truth,


When the fundamental nature of things is not recognised

the mind’s essential peace is disturbed to no avail.

The Way is perfect as vast space is perfect,

where nothing is lacking and nothing is in excess.


Indeed, it is due to our grasping and rejecting

that we do not know the True nature of things.

Live neither in the entanglements of outer things,

nor in ideas or feelings of emptiness.

Be serene and at one with things

and erroneous views will disappear by themselves.


When you try to stop activity to achieve quietude,

your very effort fills you with activity.

As long as you remain attached to one extreme or another

you will never know Oneness.

Those who do not live in the Single Way

cannot be free in either activity or quietude, in assertion or denial.


Deny the reality of things

and you miss their reality;

assert the emptiness of things

and you miss their reality.

The more you talk and think about it

the further you wander from the Truth.

So cease attachment to talking and thinking,

and there is nothing you will not be able to know.


To return to the root is to find the essence,

but to pursue appearances or “Enlightenment” is to miss the source.

To awaken even for a moment

is to go beyond appearance and emptiness.


Changes that seem to occur in the empty world

we make real only because of our ignorance.


Do not seek for the Truth;


Do not remain in a dualistic state;

avoid such easy habits carefully.

If you attach even to a trace

the Mind-essence will be lost in confusion.

Although all dualities arise from the One,

do not be attached even to ideas of this One.


When the mind exists undisturbed in the Way,

Let go of things as separate existences

and mind too vanishes.

Likewise when the thinking subject vanishes

so too do the objects created by mind.


The arising of other gives rise to Self;

giving rise to Self generates others.

Know these seeming two as facets

of the One Fundamental Reality.

In this Emptiness, these two are really one—and each contains all phenomena.

If not comparing, nor attached to “refined” and “vulgar”—


The Great Way is embracing and spacious—

to live in it is neither easy nor difficult.

Those who rely on limited views are fearful and irresolute:

To have a narrow mind,

and to be attached to getting Enlightenment

is to lose one’s centre and go astray.


When in harmony with the nature of things,

and you will walk freely and undisturbed.

However, when mind is in bondage, the Truth is hidden,

and everything is murky and unclear,

and the burdensome practice of judging

brings annoyance and weariness.


If you wish to move in the One Way,

do not dislike the worlds of senses and ideas.

Indeed, to embrace them fully

is identical with true Enlightenment.

The wise person attaches to no goals

but the foolish person fetters himself or herself.

There is one Dharma, without differentiation.

Distinctions arise from the clinging needs of the ignorant.

To seek Mind with the discriminating mind

is the greatest of mistakes.


Rest and unrest derive from illusion;

They are like dreams, phantoms, hallucinations—

it is foolish to try to grasp them.


If the eye never sleeps,

all dreams will naturally cease.

the ten thousand things

are as they are, of single essence.

To realise the mystery of this One-essence

is to be released from all entanglements.

When all things are seen without differentiation,

the One Self-essence is everywhere revealed.

No comparisons or analogies are possible

in this causeless, relationless state of just this One.


When movement stops, there is no movement—

and when no movement, there is no stopping.

When such dualities cease to exist

Oneness itself cannot exist.

To this ultimate state

no law or description applies.


For the realised mind at one with the Way

all self-centred striving ceases.

Doubts and irresolutions vanish

and the Truth is confirmed in you.

All is empty, clear, self-illuminating,

with no need to exert the mind.

Here, thinking, feeling, understanding, and imagination

are of no value.

In this world “as it really is”there is neither self nor other-than-self.


To know this Reality directly

is possible only through practicing non-duality.

When you live this non-separation,

all things manifest the One, and nothing is excluded.

Whoever comes to Enlightenment, no matter when or where,

Realises personally this fundamental Source.


This Dharma-Truth has nothing to do with big or small,

with time and space.

Here a single thought is as ten thousand years.

Not here, not there—

but everywhere always right before your eyes.

Infinitely large and infinitely small: No difference,

for definitions are irrelevant

and no boundaries can be discerned.

So likewise with “Existence” and “Non-existence.”


Don’t waste your time in arguments and discussion

attempting to grasp the ungraspable.


Each thing reveals the One,

the One manifests as all things.

To live in this Realisation

is not to worry about perfection or non-perfection.

To put your trust in the Heart-Mind is to live without separation,

and in this non-duality you are one with your Life-Source.

Words! Words!The Way is beyond language,

for in it there is no yesterday,

no tomorrow

no today.


"The Great Way is not difficult for those who have no preferences" could be edited to “The Great Way is not difficult for those who prefer anything.” Love your fate, or as the Stoic philosophers said "Amor Fati." The moment in front of you is not bothering you. You are bothering your Self about the moment in front of you. Love it to death. This is the pain that ends all pain.


Presence and your Higher Power

God is with you, to bless and help you. His spirit is all around you. Waver not in your Faith or in your prayers. All power is the Lord's. Say that to yourself often and steadily. Say it until your heart sings with joy for the safety and Real Personal Power that it means to you. Say it until the very force of the utterance drives back and puts to naught all the evils against you. Use it as a battle cry. All power is the Lord's. Then you will pass on to victory over all your sins and temptations, and you will begin to live a victorious life. Pray that with strength from God you may lead a life of victory and abundance. 


Thich Nhat Hanh said that "You do not suffer because things are impermanent. You suffer because things are impermanent and you think they are permanent."


Presence and the past

Steve Jobs said in some of his last words before dying from pancreatic cancer with a capital of 7 billion dollars “There is a big difference between being a human and BEing.” Presence is the gateway to BEing. What does that mean? Heaven is NOW-here.


Agathon wrote that "Even God cannot change the past."


The inscription of the poignant epitaph for the comedian Sean Hughes reads "I sit here with memories for company. Knowing that if life were moments, we'd all have a good time."


In French there is an expression "Chercher midi à quatorze heures", which means "Seeking noon at two o'clock." This means that you should let go of the past as it's already past.


Past and future are like dreams, but now is reality. You can't change the past and it is gone, and you can't predict the future; you can only act in the present, be in the present, live in the present. Now is the present, the time to think, to act. The consequences of not acting now are looking back with thoughts of what you might have achieved or forever dreaming of a future that you never attain, along with the anxiety that that entails. To act now is to put away thoughts of what might have been or what might never happen and to focus on BEing and doing in the present moment, because now is the only reality and now is the only place you can make things happen. All of your Real Personal Power and your influence is in the now...


Paramahansa Yogananda wrote that "In the silence of the mind, beyond all judgements, there lies the Truth." 


Michael Singer, spiritual teacher and best-selling author, who wrote the brilliant book 'Living Untethered', which is in my 'Suggested Reading List', wrote "What it means to live life is to experience the moment that is passing through you, and then experience the next moment, and then the next... In the end, enjoying life’s experiences is the only rational thing to do. You’re sitting on a planet spinning around in the middle of absolutely nowhere. You’re floating in empty space in a Universe that goes on forever. If you’re going to be here, be happy and enjoy the experience... The truth is, everything will be okay as soon as you are okay with everything." Feel your experiences as they pass through you. Then, experience the next one and the next. Life is a series of moments. Get lost in the experiences that make you come alive. And objectively detach from dysfunctional people, problems or dark experiences, instead of being lost in them.



Your story

When thinking about life, remember this: No amount of shame can change the past, and no amount of fear, anxiety, or worry can change the future. In fact they can only make it worse by interfering with the clarity of your intuitive thinking in the present moment. Egoic reaction always makes things worse.


All doubt, despair, and fear become insignificant when the intention of life becomes love. Let the light of love shine on your life. When I look back on my life, I see the pain, mistakes, and heartache. When I look in the mirror now I see strength, courage, and learned lessons. Life is a circle of happiness, sadness, hard times, and good times. If you are going through hard times, have Faith that good times are on their way. This too shall pass. Miracles are real, and they happen when you do not give up even if you want to. Elie Wiesel wrote “Whoever survives a test, whatever it may be, must tell the story. That is his duty.”


Thinking and presence

Take a deep breath, or three. Are thoughts going through your mind? Rumi, the poet and theologian says "The art of knowing is knowing what to ignore." Let me explain: It works like this: You have on average around 60,000 thoughts per day: 90 percent of them are repetitive, and 80–90 percent are negative. That’s around 45,000 negative, repetitive, sometimes catastrophising, thoughts per day. You latch on to some of the thoughts, identify with them, and these become your ‘thinking’. Or what you think is your thinking. These negative thoughts cause negative emotions, which are simply the body’s way of commenting on the quality of those thoughts. It’s just like feedback, it’s automatic. So, you live in fear, your whole life. This is our pain. This is the human condition. But it doesn't have to be that way.


Just keep the mind quiet by being present - remember to breathe.



You create your world with your thoughts: Make them good ones! Emmet Fox wrote in 'The Sermon on the Mount' that “All day long the thoughts that occupy your mind, your Secret Place, as Jesus calls it, are moulding your destiny for good or evil; in fact, the Truth is that the whole of our life’s experience is but the outer expression of inner thought. Now we can choose the sort of thoughts that we entertain. It will be a little difficult to break a bad habit of thought, but it can be done. We can choose how we shall think - in point of fact, we always do choose - and therefore our lives are just the result of the kind of thoughts we have.”


Presence is the fundamental pillar of personal transformation

As Martin Luther King Jr. said "Now is the time." Presence is a 'pre-sent' moment that has been sent to you from above. It's the key that unlocks every door. Without this keystone anything you construct in life is built on sand. It’s dust. And dust always returns to dust. As Eckhart Tolle, the contemporary voice of presence, says, “The present moment is all we have.” His book, the Power of Now, has the subheading “A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment.” It is only by being fully present that you connect with your deeper Self. That is why people go on retreats – they are actually retreating from themselves and their thinking. The power to bring you into the gap, the space between your thoughts, is where you find deep serenity, peace, stillness, presence, and intuitive intelligence devoid of fear and limiting assumptions. The highest version of you. Most of us live trapped in the movement of thought inside our heads. We create fears that have no foundation. Practice being fully present in the moment, with ‘vibrant stillness,’ as many people in personal growth circles call it, which encapsulates the feeling of movement and serenity. I call it ‘energetic serenity’. It’s a unique combination of peace and energy that you may not have felt before. Nothing like the constant pressure to hustle and achieve that ultimately leads you to fail, burn out or become mentally ill.


Are you living in the present moment?


Milan Kundera wrote that "The source of anxiety lies in the future. If you can keep the future out of mind, you can forget your worries."


Presence is the seat of your Soul

Presence is the place you will get to visit often as you awaken. Eventually you will never leave it, regardless of exterior circumstances. It becomes the ‘seat of your Soul’ as Michael Singer writes in 'Living Untethered', which is in my 'Suggested Reading' list, and you never need to get up from that beautiful place. You need to train your Self to be present. You need to practice it, cultivate it. Only presence brings total awareness. Otherwise, your days will blur by without any sense of meaning or fulfilment. You physically feel aliveness when you are present. If you are not present it is because you are hoping one day to arrive at something. If you live in the future, you will literally miss your life. You will come to on your death bed and think “I missed out on my whole life: How did that happen?” Every spiritual tradition has taught presence as being central to human happiness and connection with the other people that mean something to us. By spiritual I don’t mean religion, I simply mean looking within. We worry about not being good at certain things, but it’s never the thing that’s the problem – it’s us – once we change ourselves, our whole world changes and we become literally limitless. After all, your limits are self-imposed, aren’t they?


Emmet Fox, the spiritual guide and author of the book 'The Sermon on the Mount' wrote that “The art of life is to live in the present moment and to make that moment as perfect as we can by the realisation that we are the instruments and expression of God himself.” This is why 'The Lord's Prayer' includes "Thy Kingdom come; Thy will be done; on Earth as it is in Heaven." As Jesus said, the Kingdom of Heaven is within: It's inside you, and it's name is 'presence'. When you align your Self to God's will through prayer, meditation, and intuitive action, nothing can stop you.


Nic Nolte, in The Way of the Peaceful Warrior, a movie inspired by true life events, plays the role of a guide named Socrates in a story about the path to healing and spiritual awakening: Following some very painful lessons, an athlete transforms from an ego-centric competitor to becoming a 'peaceful warrior'. I totally identify with this story: My name Olly means 'peaceful' and Alexander means 'defender of people:' The 'Peaceful Defender of People'. As the athlete tackles a seemingly impossible gymnastic sequence in the film, “Where are you, Dan?" "Here." "What time is it?" "Now." "What are You?" "This Moment.”


World class athletes are coached to remain present. Every shot is the only shot, whether its Championship point at Wimbledon or the first point of the tournament. You must be present to win. The film director Federico Fellini said “There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the passion of life.” Johnny Cash summed it up: “You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past, don’t dwell on it. You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.” Even our children are being told this, so why do we forget?: “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is as mystery, but today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present” (Master Oogway, Kung Fu Panda).


There is no fear in the present. Contemporary protagonist Tolle says “Realise deeply that the present moment is all you have. Make the NOW the primary focus of your life… If not now, when?” Of course, such great thoughts always have their antecedents “Confine yourself to the present…. Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present” (Marcus Aurelius); Saint Charlotte said “Every day is a new day. No need to dwell on the past. Look straight ahead.” Jesus said “Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day.” “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” (Buddha). Tolle continues “Die to the past every moment. You don't need it. Only refer to it when it is absolutely relevant to the present. Feel the power of this moment and the fullness of BEing. Feel your presence… It is not uncommon for people to spend their whole life waiting to start living.” Anthony De Mello agrees “Eternity is in this moment”. Corrie ten Boom, author, wrote “Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength – carrying two days at a once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.”


Listening

No one really listens to you. Transformative Life Coaching, or “TLC,” may be the first time that you experience being really listened to. Just go to a restaurant and you will see couples, where both partners are on their phones constantly, not speaking to each other, or even looking at each other, for the entire time they’re there. It’s as if they are not there. They have trained themselves with millions of swipes to not be present. Whole families are disconnected from each other within their homes. Put your phone down. Use eye contact if the other person is comfortable with that. Take slow, deep breaths. Practice breathwork: It's so simple and so powerful. Gentle nodding to show you are listening and say “I hear you..” Ask questions. Your loved ones will literally sit up in front of your eyes as they feel seen and heard. Be like that with everyone.


Come back to presence

Babies are always present in the moment. Their natural state is to have a mind that is at ease and they revel in the experience of being alive. All is well with them. And if it isn’t it’s very short-lived. Animals are always present. Have you ever seen how serene a horse looks, or how happy your dog is to see you? Be full of gratitude for the time that people are present with you. Bring alert presence with light and energy. Really observe. Remember you are the “Manifestation of the Universe perceiving itself” as Eckhart Tolle says. You are the witness, the observer. You know how you can get through a walk, a drive, or a task without even being aware? You don’t even remember it – you weren’t there – you weren’t present. You can miss your whole life like that too. You don’t need to comment internally on what you see. Then you sense that there is not only what you perceive through your senses, you can also sense an “Underlying stillness or presence as your Self” as Eckhart Tolle says. Something inside you responds when you are in that state. You can then listen from that deeper place of inert stillness.


Alan Watts said that we should “Stop measuring days by degree of productivity and start experiencing them by degree of presence.” Alan Watts died in 1973 so he missed the whole internet, social media, and side hustle culture. If he was still around, I imagine he’d roll his eyes at the silliness of it all. What I love most about his message is that he offers a change of perspective. In today’s modern world, there’s an emphasis on doing. However, Alan Watts suggests there should be more BEing. This was best summed up by Rick Warren when he said: “We are human BEings, not human doings.”


Celebrate the small moments. That’s the key to fulfilment. It’s about feeling the day more and letting go of your burden of fear. Be life. Be alive. Just BE. You are the expression of the oneness that is the Universe. Presence is not about just doing yoga occasionally. Carry your practice to your whole waking life, in every moment and to everyone you meet. You must fill the day with fulfilment, gratitude, and connection to be truly full of joy. The wonder of seeing the face of your child as they light up when they come home from school, and you really take the time to look in their eyes and ask them about their day and really listen. They will feel heard, valued and seen. As Eckhart Tolle says “Thinking becomes a habitual place of mental noise, where you feel that’s me. The next step in the evolution of human consciousness is stepping out of self talk, the conditioned mind, and realising there is much more to who I am than this conditioned content of my mind. And that is the beginning of awakening. You have to believe that there is more to who you are than the self talk in the head.”


Accept what is, let go of what was, have Faith in what will be. “If your mind carries a heavy burden of past, you will experience more of the same. The past perpetuates itself through lack of presence. The quality of your consciousness at this moment is what shapes the future... The past gives you an identity and the future holds the promise of salvation, of fulfilment in whatever form. Both are illusions… Always say “yes” to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is? What could be more insane than to oppose life itself, which is now and always now? Surrender to what is. Say “yes” to life - and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you… All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of non-forgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence... As soon as you honour the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve, and life begins to flow with joy and ease. When you act out the present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care, and love - even the most simple action” (Eckhart Tolle).


Lao Tzu wrote that "If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present."


Once we realise that “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us” (Ralph Waldo Emerson), we feel a tremendous sense of serenity and peace. Dale Carnegie, author, said “Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” 


Ralph Waldo Emerson and presence


Presence and business

So, how does this apply to business? Successful business involves setting goals, interacting with others in the context of meetings, or outside these, and doing the work. When you create goals, obstacles arrive. Always. The Bhagavad Ghita - one of the ancient texts of Hinduism, that dates back 2,500 years, states “Do not be too attached to the outcome, then it’s much more likely that the outcome will be good.” If you have an excessive attachment, then the journey becomes very stressful. Here don’t focus on what you are trying to achieve, as in the goal, but be as present as you can in the doing, so that it doesn’t become stressful. It’s the same with cold water swimming or cold showers, unless you are fully present, they are excruciating! Stress is toxic to you. In some companies the whole environment is toxic, especially when ego is involved, where people try to sabotage each other. I was very much in this environment and it’s not sustainable and certainly not worth any money that the environment will pay for you to suffer it. There is no joy or fulfilment there. Don’t seek ego satisfaction – focus on being present in the joy of doing. Face any obstacle at once, after a deep breath and a short pause, and think assertively how you can either pass the obstacle or use it to learn. This is equally true in your personal life. Don’t react as though the obstacles should not be happening. What if every obstacle was actually created by the part of you that loves your true Self the most, as a lesson, in order to redirect your life in line with your true purpose?


Eckhart Tolle suggests that you start every business meeting with a moment of presence. 30 or 60 seconds. Be alert – then you are accessing the deeper intelligence and you become more creative, and so do all those around you. You bring stillness to discussions. You become aware of your own alertness. You are not judging what people are saying – you don’t react, you create. They create. Become spacious when communicating with people. Give them space. Ask questions, not just respond. This is a very creative approach. Otherwise every meeting just becomes about ego: Terrified 7-year olds masquerading as adults needing to convince themselves of their worthiness.


Presence and coaching

Presence is the basis of great coaching, of Deep Coaching: Holding space for the other to step out of their egos and into their highest version of themselves. It was also the basis of the Socratic method. Socrates said “I am the only one who knows that I know nothing.” That means being comfortable in a state of not knowing. That is the first step to true wisdom. By asking questions the group comes up with an answer or you do yourself. Your ego is what limits you and at the same time lies and tells you that you are as good as you can get: That’s so very far from the Truth.


Be mindful of presence when you perform any physical action. Focus on your breath or your inner body sensations. Bring BEing into the doing, until they merge completely. You are a human BEing not a human doing. Be mindful especially when you do the things that you do every day – then you will have mindful moments or gaps throughout the day – for example when washing your hands; walking up stairs… Things stop being a means to an end – they become an end in themselves. This brings in space. Then even when you are engaged in the doing you can sense the presence that you are. This increases your intelligence, beyond your IQ intelligence. You can even practice mindfulness when using a computer – have inner body awareness, and focus on your breathing, as the computer draws energy out of you, so it’s doubly important to do it then. Go more deeply below the surface of the present moment – whatever you perceive with your senses. The surface of the present moment is a way of entering the present moment – you literally “come to your senses,” as they say, and come out of your stream of thinking. You ‘wake up’ into the surroundings of where you are. To go deeper you become aware of the background to your senses: this happens automatically. This depth never changes, it’s like the bottom of the sea – it’s your conscious space. The surface undergoes continuous change. The depth doesn’t change as it is pure consciousness. That is where you find serenity. If you are rooted in that, you will find peace and tranquillity. The ripples are the surface of the sea, yet they are one with the depths. You need to realise the depths to which you are always connected and you don’t even know it yet. But you will…


Get used to silence. Deepak Chopra, in his book 'The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success', says silence is one of the pillars of tapping into your pure potentiality, the Universal life force that brings all your capacity to achieve limitless success.


It's been said that God exists only in the present. That means we must live in the present if we are to find God. Only in the present do we have the power to choose our attitudes and actions, and it is this freedom that links us to God's power.


Eckhart Tolle says “Presence is the arising of a dimension of consciousness from where you can become aware that there is a voice in the head. That awareness is beyond thinking. It’s a space of consciousness where you can be the “Observer of your own mind”- the awareness behind the thought processes. For human beings to discover this dimension is extraordinarily important. When you no longer look to the mind to provide you with your sense of identity - because your sense of identity now comes now from a deeper place - that’s the shift that changes everything, dramatically. It is the most important thing that can happen in your lifetime. As presence arises, you’ll find in many areas of your life enormous improvements. One is that the brash noisy voice in the head (your ego), that before created such anguish and unhappiness, no longer has that power over you. As the mind’s conditioning begins to subside, you can be with people, events, and situations in a non-dysfunctional way, aligned with whatever arises in the present moment.” There is a sense of aliveness that flows in when we step out of the mind and into stillness.


Sigmund Freud, neurologist and founder of psychoanalysis, said “You are not your thoughts.” The still quiet voice that you will start to hear is the true you. You have access to it anytime and anywhere. Amy Johnson wrote in her brilliant book “Being Human” “Something truly magical happens when you deeply get that the thoughts that roll through your mind all day long are not yours. You aren’t the thinker of your thoughts.” When you become Enlightened to this, which simply means waking up, you know that your happiness does not depend on people, places or things - it can’t! Awareness and Enlightenment are very simple. Eckhart Tolle says “The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but thought about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral. It is as it is.” So, presence is relinquishing identification with the thinking mind.


Abraham Lincoln said “The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time.” Abraham Lincoln did great things for the United States. He took life one day at a time.. He broke the future into manageable pieces. We can do the same. We can live in the present and focus on the task at hand. Spirituality comes when we focus this way. When we stay in the present we find a choice. And we worry less about the future. Still, we must have goals. We must plan for the future. Goals and plans help us give more credit to the present than to the future. And when we feel good about the present, we feel good about the future.


Inspired by Eckhart Tolle, in our 1:1 coaching sessions, we will go deep below the surface, in 1 minute then 5 minute deeper dives into presence using silence and being attentive to what sensations you have inside your body with a focus on your breathing. The deeper dive happens automatically as you settle into this, like a glass filling with water then plunging to the depths as the air escapes. When you go below the surface the intrusive thoughts simply stop coming.


In 1:1 coaching we will also do simple and powerful exercises that you will have never done before, inspired the psychologist, founder of the humanistic approach, and coaching master Carl Rogers, and also inspired by the ‘Thinking Environment’ described by Nancy Kline, in her game changing book “Time to Think” that we will use to drop out of your inner critical self talk and become instantly mindful and feel totally connected and present. In our sessions we will also talk about the why’s and how’s of yoga, mindfulness and meditation, and how they also relate to presence. In short I will arm you with the tools you need to live deeply in the present, live your life, transform to your true Self, and connect with others, the basis of true authentic joy. That's where we will start. Where we go from there is up to you. My gift is to be your guide.


Namaste.


Sending you love, light, and blessings brothers.


Olly



Email me: 





Hello,

I am delighted and enchanted to meet you. I coach men with 'Deep Coaching', 'Supercoaching', and Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). Thank you for reading this far. I very much look forward to connecting with the highest version of you, to seeing your highest possibility, and to our conversations. Please do contact me via my email for a free connection call and a free experience of coaching on Zoom or in person. 


“Transformative life coaching uniquely creates and holds the space for you to see your self afresh, with clarity, and step into new ways of BEing, which will transform how you perceive and intuitively create your world. My work is to guide you to raise your own conscious awareness to the level that you want to achieve.”







Click here for the books that I know will help you along your journey of recovering your Self:









I have a Bachelor's degree in Natural Sciences from Trinity College, Cambridge; a Master's Degree in Philosophy from Trinity College, Cambridge; a PhD Doctorate in Scientific Research from University College London (UCL); a Medical Degree (MD/MBBS) from The Royal Free Hospital School of Medicine, London and have been a doctor and reconstructive trauma and cancer surgeon in London for 20 years. I have a number of other higher qualifications in science and surgery. I have published over 50 peer reviewed PubMed cited scientific journal articles, have been an associate editor and frequent scientific faculty member, and am the author of several scientific books. I have been awarded my Diploma in Transformative Life Coaching in London, which has International Coaching Federation (ICF) Accreditation, as well as the UK Association for Coaching (AC), and the European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC). I have been on my own transformative journey full time for over five years and I am ready to be your guide to you finding out who you really are and how the world works.




Please let me know if you would like to join our 'VOICE for men' VIP community: 'Vulnerability & Openness Is a Choice Ensemble', 'Visibility Is Power', where men can find their strength, courage, and authenticity, by dropping their egocentric fears and instead communicate openly with vulnerability. We are co-creating this space. It will change your life. It will empower you. This community is a safe space for men to connect and discuss philosophy, spirituality, positive psychology, awakening to Self-realisation, wisdom and timeless Truths, to share our experience, strength and hope, and to find solutions to our pain and fears. Our meeting is free to join. There is no script, just sharing.


 

 

 

 

 
 
 

Comments

bottom of page