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Love-Based Leadership

Updated: Jan 28

There are two ways to live your life: Through the lens of fear, or the lens of love. My spiritual awakening has taught me that love always wins. A miracle, in any domain of your life, is the result of a shift in perception from fear to love. This applies equally to your personal life and to your business life. I have worked in many major international institutions and also major teaching hospitals throughout London. Mostly what I saw being demonstrated in business was Fear-Based Leadership (FBL). I very rarely saw any examples of Love-Based Leadership (LBL). I saw many 'King Babies' acting out of ego, like terrified, petrified, 7-year olds trying to run the show. Do you really want your senior executives acting like this?


Janet Hagberg has described the levels of Real Personal Power in business. Ego is level 3 power and influence, whereas level 6 (the highest level of leadership) relates to wisdom and love.


Does this match your own experience? So what is the distinction? What is this based on? Who has demonstrated this type of leadership? Margaret Mead said "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed individuals can change the world. In fact, it's the only thing that ever has"...


Lance Secretan said that "The quintessential leader lives in the moment and leads from the heart"


The best way to live life is through a lens of love. So, why do people leave love at the door when they go into work? This leads to a lack of alignment in your life, a crisis of integrity, and inauthenticity. This is true of government organisations, international institutions, hospitals, healthcare, the military, and the education system: Wherever communication and leadership occurs. A miracle, in any domain of your life, is simply a shift in perception from fear to love. Do you want to see miracles occurring in your organisation?


Love-Based Leadership (LBL) and emotional sobriety

The major teaching of emotional sobriety is that for a successful life in all domains you need to come from a place of unconditional love at all times with everyone that you meet. This is not just 12 step theory applied to all of life, it is a timeless Truth. Simply serve the present moment in front of you. The 12 step recovery Big Book calls emotional insobriety the root of the problem. It’s grounded in fear. It’s an emotional syndrome. It always causes us to ultimately fail unless we do something about it. Bill W., one of the greatest leaders of the 20th Century, who founded the 12 step practice movement, which is practised daily by several million people worldwide, wrote about emotional sobriety and the need to live life by expressing unconditional love in his now legendary letter. In “The Next Frontier: Emotional Sobriety,” a letter written by Bill in 1953 he reflects on how even spiritually awakened people can lack emotional maturity, craving approval and security like dependent adolescents. He shares his personal struggles with this, realising he must relinquish irrational dependencies on people and circumstances to access emotional freedom in all domains of his life. Wilson suggests that the means to this emotional freedom is the outgoing, unconditional love embodied in the Prayer of St. Francis, the 11th Step Prayer. Emotional sobriety - Bill Wilson’s letter was published in the Grapevine Magazine in 1958 titled: “Emotional Sobriety - The Next Frontier:”:



Fear-Based Leadership (FBL) versus Love-Based Leadership (LBL)

This distinction has been highlighted by world-class supercoach Stephen Sainato with his private coaching clients who were reimagining what it means to be a leader and a creator. A team of committed and inspired individuals, working in positions aligned with their authentic passion and led by a loving leader will change the world. This is true of the master chef at Gleneagles Restaurant, which wins the 'Times' best restaurant of the year every year. This was true of the greatest and most powerful leader that the world has ever known: Jesus Christ. This was also the philosophy of Mahatma Gandhi and also Martin Luther King Jr., both leaders who changed the world.


I will now share the powerful distinction of these two leadership styles:


  • FBL is when leaders use guilt and shame to control and force people into action

  • LBL is when we use vision and purpose to collaborate and inspire people into action.

  • FBL fosters an unhealthy culture defined by stress, selfishness, and destruction

  • LBL fosters a healthy culture defined by enthusiasm, contribution, and creation.

  • FBL takes life whereas LBL gives life

  • FBL wounds whereas LBL heals

  • FBL depresses whereas LBL elevates

  • LBL comes from a place of scarcity whereas LBL comes from a place of abundance, and manifests as such

  • FBL is a limiting environment with entitlement, negative competition among colleagues, and belittlement

  • LBL is an empowering environment with acknowledgment, appreciation, support, and celebration

  • FBL includes the absence of emotional awareness and the presence of arrogance

  • LBL includes the absence of rancour and the presence of humility, wisdom, empathy, and service

  • FBL is ego whereas LBL is soul

  • FBL is taking whereas LBL is giving

  • LBL produces expectations whereas LBL produces agreements: Expectations never work, whereas agreements do

  • FBL moves away from the divine whereas LBL moves toward the sacred


The world has been ruled by fear for too long: And this applies in organisations, corporations, government, medicine, the military, schools, families, and more. In fact this applies to any institution.


We teach who we be, and we have taught fear because we’ve been afraid, stuck in survival mode.


But the world is shifting.


The awakening has begun and I’m here to serve it.


It’s time we heal.


It’s time we transform.


It’s time we elevate into a limitless possibility more aligned with our true nature.


It starts with self-leadership.


It starts with self-love.


Let us shift from fear to love (the ultimate miracle).


What does it take to operationalise LBL in business?


LBL in business by Jeff Lerner... What it really takes


The world needs to heal its relationship with work. This will have a profound impact on creating a positive work environment. The majority of waking hours in the Western World are spent at work. We try to be loving at home, but leave our hearts and our hats at the door when we arrive at work. This results in a crisis of integrity, meaning that leaders are less than whole. So you get leaders putting on some hard-assed fake mask to try to appear big: But why do you act so big when you are not so small?


This is what truly means to lead with love and what it takes to foster a workplace where employees thrive and customers trust.


In any organisation there are three stakeholders: The employer, the employee, and the client. The reason why most organisations don't have LBL as their operational style is some varying degree of fear and control, hierarchical work structures, management by threat, compliance, or coercion. This is also the way that communication occurs in organisations. The result of this is that employees have to get 'smaller' when they go to work, and be less fully themselves. So you have a small-minded employer and scared, diminished employees who also have to put a mini-me costume and mask on if they want to be hired and survive in this organisational culture. People hire the 'dog's body' rather than the creative high-achiever. I know this very well from personal experience. It also means that executives hire people who are substandard instead of inspired and aggrandised. This is why organisations fail. I once had a 'boss' in a major London teaching hospital who was desperate to show me what car he drove as he was so insecure, he thought that somehow his car might give him some credibility as a leader. He also hired a nobody to work from him instead of the best candidate out of fear of losing his own 'status.' What he didn't get was that everyone could see that all his actions were based on fear, control, and coercion.


It should totally be ok, celebrated, and encouraged that someone who has integrity and is loving is the one who is hired. As a client, you want to know that you are doing business with human beings who want the best for you. This rewarding of humanity and authenticity also increase employee performance, loyalty and retention within the business. The employer is then creating an environment where employees feel psychologically safe, is allowed to be human; reducing absenteeism from work stress and also burnout. The employees may then be loved for being human with their customers.


LBL puts an end to promulgating the lie that 'because business is being conducted' where there are inhuman transactional arrangements that this is superior to one based on human unconditionally loving relationships. FBL means that executives merely operate from a place of 'covering their own ass' and fear of hiring someone who may be better than them, which should always be the case in any successful business environment. Customers want to trust businesses, and this requires all employees to be open and loving. This is not even a risk. Its a business risk to favour FBL. FBL is modern-day slavery. We need to bring humanity, compassion, love, and tolerance into our work at all levels. This is how you will get your business to really take off and fly.


There are two ways to be a leader: As your petrified, wounded 7-year old self or your Higher Self. As a CEO, do you really want 'King babies' running your company as 'senior' executives?

Who do you want to run your company? Wounded children or the highest version executives? The key distinction is love in any leadership style. This starts with you


Speak in such a way that others love to listen to you: Listen in such a way that others love to speak to you.


George Bernard Shaw wrote that “Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” Are you ready to change your mind?


Namaste.


Sending you love, light, and blessings brothers.


Olly



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Hello,

I am delighted and enchanted to meet you. I coach men with 'Deep Coaching', 'Supercoaching', and Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). Thank you for reading this far. I very much look forward to connecting with the highest version of you, to seeing your highest possibility, and to our conversations. Please do contact me via my email for a free connection call and a free experience of coaching on Zoom or in person. 


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I have a Bachelor's degree in Natural Sciences from Trinity College, Cambridge; a Master's Degree in Philosophy from Trinity College, Cambridge; a PhD Doctorate in Scientific Research from University College London (UCL); a Medical Degree (MD/MBBS) from The Royal Free Hospital School of Medicine, London and have been a doctor and reconstructive trauma and cancer surgeon in London for 20 years. I have a number of other higher qualifications in science and surgery. I have published over 50 peer reviewed PubMed cited scientific journal articles, have been an associate editor and frequent scientific faculty member, and am the author of several scientific books. I have been awarded my Diploma in Transformative Life Coaching in London, which has International Coaching Federation (ICF) Accreditation, as well as the UK Association for Coaching (AC), and the European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC). I have been on my own transformative journey full time for over five years and I am ready to be your guide to you finding out who you really are and how the world works.




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