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The Divine Masculine & The Divine Feminine: A Paradigm for Collective Transformation

Updated: Jan 25

INTRODUCTION

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Masculine and feminine energies are both equally as important and necessary in every one of us, regardless of our gender: We have both energies moving through us. The differences between the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine can be remarkable and, like most opposing forces (Yin and Yang), the balance of the two energies within us will determine how much we thrive and also how harmonious our relationships with others are. You have most likely heard these terms being used, but do you know what they are? Is it a way of understanding the world, ourselves and each other, or some form of enlightenment? This article weighs in on what men need to know about the Divine Masculine, and also the Divine Feminine, how they relate to personal transformation, and how we can use these concepts in the quest for a collective awakening and healing, repairing our ruptured deep connections along the way.


Transformative Life Coaching draws on, amongst other things, positive psychology, philosophy, and spiritual concepts. The Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine concepts are not 'woowoo' or 'New Age' - it's relevant to a collective awakening. I am a scientist, a doctor, and have a basic science PhD, and have written over 50 published peer reviewed scientific articles. But I have learned, despite my many degrees, that true wisdom does not come from books or research articles, and there is no PhD to your life. Looking within is where you will find truth. The Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine do draw from psychology, and I can feel their truth and how it helps us to understand how we can transform in relation to ourselves and each other. I hope that you can feel it too. Truth is truth and your truth in relation to you is the absolute truth. These concepts have the potential to bring so much joy, peace, manifestation, and harmony. In this blog post I will answer the following questions:

  • What is the Divine Masculine?

  • What is the Divine Feminine?

  • Why are these concepts important and how do they relate to each other?

  • How do these concepts align with spiritual awakening and personal and collective transformation?

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The Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine


What is the Divine Masculine?

The Divine (or Embodied) Masculine holds space, creates safety and structure, witnesses without judgement, penetrates via presence, is fully resourced, and has an outward energetic life force. The key elements are also about inner and outer power and strength, stability, survival, doing, self-confidence, curiosity, protectiveness, willpower, and taking action. Using the left side of the brain, it is analytical, focussed, practical, problem solving, makes decisions rapidly, logical, loves purpose and direction and when used well it can lead to real creativity. There is also a real sense of independence with the masculine side which loves to feel important and acknowledged. Grudges are not held for long as this interferes with the sense of freedom it requires. The Divine masculine is also deeply present and protective, allowing a space to be created where the Divine in us can meet each other.


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The divine masculine has elements of light and dark


Goethe's wrote “And to all this man is drawn by the power of his own soul, by the powers that are dimly sensed when he passes through the inner portals of the soul, when he seeks for that divine voice within calling him to the union of the ‘eternal masculine’, — the universe, with the ‘eternal feminine’, — consciousness.” This is more than just about traits, this is a calling to return to the soul, and expanded consciousness.


The Divine Masculine is what allows us to "do," to take decisive action, but not aggressive or angry action despite what we might assume. Instead, it is based in loving faith-based action, with Grace. The masculine listens to the Divine Feminine's knowledge, receives her intuitive wisdom with openness, and then acts on that knowledge with confidence. This action is based in knowing that we are a part of something much larger than ourselves. It is masculine energy that unites the world with this love and "personal authority." It is "he" who looks out for, protects, and provides for "his" community, family, and those in need. The Wounded Masculine, the conditioned, traumatised shadow of the Divine Masculine perverts this by creating conflict when fear has overtaken faith, and "he" feels the need to prove a sense of worth due to feeling unworthy of inclusion or love.


The acceptance of the Divine Masculine and Divine feminine in each of us is a 'brothers’ spiritual coming of age'. Most men block their feminine energy. It can take months and months of work before a man feels safe enough to just express an authentic emotion, other than anger: Or drop his ego, whereas women usually in a first Transformative Life Coaching (TLC) session will feel a lot safer. Men are being encouraged (to the dismay of some unconscious people) to honour their own humanity in all its facets, to feel the feels they’ve been denied and act on them. It’s a shifting of restrictions on what a man is allowed to be, what he's allowed to do and feel, how he expresses himself, influences his peers and the next generation, his children. Men have also been suffocating beneath the bonds placed on their very existence as emotive, nurturing beings. The patriarchy causes men to suffer too by burying their emotions alive - they then resurface as the shadow in a controlling manner. The pain isn’t quantifiable, let alone comparable: Like with like can't be compared between the genders. We have to realise that collective compassion is needed. Without in any way belittling the suffering of women, men suffer in silence too. These injustices neither negate or belittle each gender’s pain. It's simply wounding at a species-deep level. The time of balance has begun, with all genders beginning to feel the pain and seek to ease it collectively and to heal the collective wounds and rupture that it has caused through the conditioned mind. Difficult continuing conversations with many false starts and do-overs are happening. While women have endured and fought against a full range of societal prisons affecting everything from our bodies to our participation in the world, men have also been suffocating beneath the bonds placed on their very existence as emotive, nurturing beings. Compassion requires understanding and truth, not projected narratives. For this we need to listen, and be open and vulnerable. The flip side of that truth is young males have had their humanity shamed and stunted as they grew to manhood, a spiritual constriction as brutal as foot binding in its way. Only, their damage expressed itself internally with shrapnel ravaging their loved ones and community. The ones in control crippled them, boys adapted to survive and then went on to continue the cycle that hobbled them. They suppressed the trauma of their emotional wings being broken beneath a learned pride in emulating their oppressors. It takes a brave man to be open and vulnerable, to wear the flamboyant colours his heart may long for, to relearn how to love effusively and openly, while his brothers watch on tentatively and sometimes with judgement. It takes huge Self-compassion to step out of the drama triangle that is victim and villain, to create something new, or at least long lost from matriarchal and more egalitarian societies. Because they knew, they all knew how to love with all their hearts as children, when they lived in bliss and wellbeing, before the conditioned mind. It’s still a risky thing in modern society for a man to coax his wounded inner child out of hiding or release it from the cage he has built to protect it, the armour of ego, love it and allow it to be loved, and allow its creativity, playfulness, joy and vulnerability to shine through. The tenets of manly men in all their violent, cold brashness still cling like rust to our world. The divine masculine is about not only polishing that rust away to reveal the original brilliance of souls, but also standing in fierce defiance of allowing it to tarnish the pristine hearts of new baby men. As fathers we have a divine duty to break the generational trauma. This is easier said than done and requires Self-awareness, forgiveness, and strength. In the face of an old regime that fears emasculation and shames them at every opportunity for what they fail to recognise as the very thing our species needs to thrive. This is not a conversation that can be had without women, nor without untangling the generations-old injustices at the hands of grown men. It’s time to sit with each other as siblings of humanity, striving to accept others' truth and honour it. Because hearts and trust are won with understanding and compassion, never judgement. All around, men are exploring what it means to be a good man, a full part of their families and relationships. They are strangling themselves working their way into baby carriers and wraps, finding joy in sending mothers off to work while they become the stay at home caregiver. It’s now men with Daddy blogs and play groups, men who braid their daughters' hair with pride, who take their children to their various activities, and remain present with them at all times, so that they are seen, heard, valued, and loved unconditionally, as well as kept safe. Men are hugging and cuddling their baby's boys, teaching them that real men (and women) cry and are allowed the full beautiful range of emotion, and thats the only way to be and to heal. They’re not only struggling to undo their own conditioning, but learning and instilling humanity in their children. Even the older generations are tiptoeing into the conversation, in their own ways and at their own pace. Elder males are becoming more accepting of the fluidity of traditional gender norms and roles. A quiet wave of, “I don’t understand it, but I’m trying,” has begun to murmur across the conversation. Not understanding it is not a reason to not accept it or judge it. Understanding is a commitment. The time has come to sit in each others' truths quietly, listening and observing in turns as we grow back into the best of our selves. It is going to be so worth it. It already is. If both women and men can feel seen, safe, and trusting, then collective love and awakening can flourish. It's time to view your fellow humans as individual hearts worthy of understanding and support: To reject the worn-out soundbites of gender stereotypes and backlash. It’s time to celebrate the age of the divine masculine as it pairs with the power of the rising divine feminine. Balance in the hearts of blended humanity. It is time for women and men to accept the divine feminine and masculine as part of all of us.


For without this transcendence what is love? Before you read on I would like to ask you to define love. We all need it but I think collectively we have forgotten what it is. As Brené Brown so beautifully writes, we cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honour the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection. Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them–we can only love others as much as we love ourselves. We are mirrors for each other. To love ourselves and support each other in the process of becoming real is perhaps the greatest single act of daring greatly. Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed and rare. They should not be mistaken for love: That was our mistake as wounded children as we could not know otherwise. When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible. The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows. It’s what holds us back from true power. So step into your higher Self, love your Self and mirror that awareness to the world. Then you will be truly powerful. “You’re Higher-ed”. Create a space of radical compassion, non-judgement, love, presence and energy where you see the other for what they are, human and divine, lightness and darkness, and that’s their limitless power. Finding the other within is the first step to love. For what is love for others but a mirror for our Self-love? With time, and in particular when the transformation becomes visible in every action, word, and behaviour, trust and safety will become embedded in the relationships. This also involves having a vision for ourselves, facilitated through self-compassion and allowing ourselves to change and transform, and allowing the other to have a vision for themselves, and of a beautiful life together. It allows a deep understanding of compassion, which means acceptance, and of unconditional love, which need not necessarily involve romantic love, and to be free of attachments, yet with deep authentic connection, in alignment with our new embodied higher Selves. It involves stepping out of drama, negativity and projection, and making peace with our past. It means connecting at soul-level. From higher Self to higher Self. It means celebrating when the other does things that one can't, especially where those things are done selflessly. Being intently listened to, not to reply but to understand, is essential to developing a deep rapport and being seen, heard, and valued. Having faith placed in us and doing likewise is so critical to feeling empowered. Being present, gentle when indicated, and slowing down at times is a portal to deep connection. Surrendering to each other is an indication of recognising the divine in one another. Understanding when closeness, company and connection, both physically and emotionally, are wanted helps build that deep connection. Climbing the mountain of excitement and pure energy together, with patience is crucial, crossing bridges to wonder and mystery without fear or shame, with an immense capacity to love, feel belonging, support and to be carried when required.


One of the greatest characteristics of the Divine Masculine is his search for meaning and his purpose in life. Whilst on the path of discovering his purpose, he will take turns, go through ups and downs, struggles and challenges. This path, if he chooses, is the way to his liberation and soul fulfilment in life. A Divine Masculine who has found his purpose is unstoppable in pursuing it, thus evolving higher and higher in his life and his being. His purpose is his directions which enables him to steer his ship through the unpredictable oceans of life with a firm and strong will, ready to take on the storms that are coming up randomly. It is his anchor in times of uncertainty and his destination. His purpose might change over time, or rather his path to his purpose. Once the Divine Masculine has discovered his underlying, deep purpose on which his values and integrity are based on, he will find and make new ways to fulfil his soul contract in life.


On the light side of the divine masculine there are protection, strong foundations, safety. On the shadow side of masculine energy, if not balanced or aware, it can lead to anger, resentment, inner conflict, dominance, and being emotionless and egotistical. The Wounded Masculine is avoidant, fearful, aversive to communication, reactive, controlling, bullying, tyrannical and loves a battlefield. He wants to wear armour. More about this later.


The Divine Masculine lives in perfect balance with the Divine Feminine. It values all of life equally, and operates from the heart. They are no longer tolerating unconscious and unkind behaviour. They are standing up for themselves, speaking from the heart, and stepping into the power of their true, balanced, authentic selves. This is healing, and this is us choosing to step into our freedom. And now to the Divine Feminine.


What is the divine feminine?

The essence of the Divine Feminine is the spark of life that everything grows from. The same energy that grows a plant grows us. The divine feminine is the innate body, heart, gut, and wisdom that all human beings have within them. It is our ability to sense, feel and intuit our highest options. Using the right side of the brain is believed to be the "more artistic and spiritual" side and is responsible for addressing one's emotions; it is therefore related to the feminine. Unfortunately, we have lost touch with these natural abilities in western civilisation. Religions have exhorted allegiance to what might be called supernatural love, union with the transcendent Logos as the incontrovertible spiritual ideal. For the most part, we are not taught to think or feel for ourselves, but to simply believe what we are told. The feminine is the river to the river bed of the masculine. She is the vision, the oracle, Divine feminine energy represents intuition, creation, BEing, wisdom, expression, compassion, the flow of things, love. What the Divine Mother really stands for is our innate relationship to Source.


Lost, even buried, in this one-sidedness has been the warmth and substantiality of natural love, the immanent presence of Eros at the heart of each cell in creation. Other names for the universal recognition of this dynamic benevolence are Qwan Yin, in the Chinese Tradition, The Great Mother of Aboriginal Renown, The Great Goddess of Western Paganism and The Blessed Mother of Christianity. In each instance, a personally recognisable expression of the Divine Feminine is active in our lives. These aspects of the divine feminine stress the values of caring, acceptance, intimacy, empathy, compassion, and love.


Thankfully, the worldwide emergence of women (normally thought of as the carrier of feminine energy) as the undeniable determining force in our social equation is becoming common knowledge. From the pioneering Women's Consciousness Movement in the United States, to women's ongoing, and increasingly visible struggle for civil and religious freedom throughout the world, the planetary social order is progressively and rapidly being shaped and influenced by women, and their unique feminine consciousness.


The feminine is waking up to her divine qualities and offering these gifts to the world, so the masculine is awakening to a new (actually old) way of being with the feminine. Anthropologists such as Riane Eisler recognise that partnership societies in which the feminine and masculine were equally honoured were the norm until approximately 3,300 years ago.


The Divine Feminine is what allows us to just "BE." It is "powerful, loving, and caring," and allows faith, trusting deep inner knowing and higher intuition. It allows us to take our time with observations. "She" discovers her way from the inside, by feeling wisdom, love, and freedom from within. She is "magnetic" and "attracts everything she wants" simply by knowing that it is already hers; this allows for the manifestation of her dreams. She is also reflective, open, creative, authentic, flows, and is at ease with surrender.


Each man is made complete through his Divine Feminine, which means the energy inside themselves and in their partner. Society is built on separation and competition. Spirituality involves deep authentic connection through shared energies. A man, firm in his Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine energies, can build anything in this 3D world without competing with anyone, because he is the creation force. He must embrace both energies in order to build empires for him and his Divine Feminine partner. If his mind is rooted in competition and separation, he will not become whole within, and hence never reach the level of consciousness necessary to build his empire. A competitive mind can build empires in 3D as well, but remember that this journey will be paved with suffering and pain for himself, his family and everyone involved. A man, rooted in competition, will never create but rather take away from others, hence making others suffer, hence making himself suffer. Nothing will ever be enough. He thrives to have more and more. Notice that his desires are purely external factors, e.g. more money, more fame, more attention. Men who suppress their Divine Feminine energies are crippled in their ability to become whole, to truly live a life in abundance and to build their empire together with their divine feminine partner. They are chasing external factors, people and things. He has not learned (yet) to do the inner work, to get into his heart space and feel the unconditional love that he is and receives. A man, embracing both of his divine energies, is so much more powerful than someone who is pushing through life with total unconsciousness. And yet, he knows that he is, he never feels superior, embodies humility as he knows that he has unique talents and gifts that must be shared, he never gets back into competition mode.


For a man, and woman as well, it is important to understand and embrace both divine energies. There cannot be an architect (Divine Feminine) without the builder (Divine Masculine), no designer without craftsman. Coming together in a relationship, even a Twin Flame Reunion, the manifestation powers of both partners merge into one universal power house. Both are balanced within, understanding their energies, and also understanding the dynamics in a conscious relationship. There has to be balance within and balance on the outside. Whatever is to be created on the outside reality first has to be created within.


The combined forces of the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine in a relationship are able to tear apart their current reality and create their desired reality from scratch. He has to accept the fact that he is simply the creator for his divine feminine’s creativity. He calls the shots, builds their empire, yes, but without his partner he would not be able to create anything of significance. Intuition comes from the divine feminine. They grow in awareness, which is the foundation and purpose of their relationship.


Both are deeply rooted in their consciousness. They know their purpose in life and both pursue it relentlessly. And since everyone’s purpose is the same - to add to the advancement of humanity - they have a great chance to combine their forces under one flag, one mission, one goal, one purpose. A purpose is what drives the Divine Masculine to build empires. The gravity of his purpose is pulling him forward effortlessly. He is taking responsibility for his own life, his decisions, his Divine Feminine partner, his family, his business. As long as he follows his purpose. As long as he won’t let anyone distract him. Distractions are everywhere in the 3D reality, but a man who is firm in his energies and his purpose can shrug them off with a smile.


Together as a couple, they are able to manifest instantly what it is that they want. It is all but a matter of surrendering to the universal flow, obeying the universal laws, setting intentions, and detaching from any specific outcome. Remember that the universe is providing you with everything you want to create. Faith and trust in the universal creation powers is necessary to live in abundance and always be taken care of. The universe is abundant and will always provide you with abundance if you are open to receiving it. The nature of the feminine energy is to flow. She loves to flow. She needs to flow. Only in that flow of love, creativity, music, dance can she fully let go and be herself. In order to flow, she needs stability in her life. She needs that one solid point in her life around which she can flow. This stability makes it possible for her to fully let go in her flowing. This stability is provided by the masculine energy. Either within her, or through her chosen partner. Having this stability in her life gives her the safety to flow. She flows through her creativity, creating magical visions of life and existence. Without stability in her life, she won’t flow. She cannot flow because the feminine energy needs directions as to where to flow. As soon as she, the feminine energy, has found her stability – provided by herself first then added by her masculine counterpart in the relationship – she feels like breaking free from all boundaries and limitations. She is free to flow. And her flowing is the most powerful, wonderful, magical thing you have ever seen in your life.


A man's greatest gift is his vulnerability. ways in which he can do that is to fully open up his mind, body and spirit to her. He exposes his most inner feelings and emotions to her, knowing that she could rip his heart out any moment. But yet, he stands strong, firm and fully open. A woman who is fully evolved in her feminine energy, blooming, radiating, flowing, wild, boundless, free, strong. A man, fully embraced in his masculinity and femininity fears nothing. Not even the moment of “death” when he is at his most vulnerable moment. Each day is lived as it were his last - Memento Mori - remember you will die. Vulnerability is the greatest courage. A woman’s greatest gift to a man is when she lets him tear down the walls around her heart and enter. She is the Empress within. When he hesitates, when he is indecisive, her heart will close down. It is now up to him, the Warrior, to prove that he is worthy to enter the realms of her heart. Or move away in defeat. The Divine Masculine’s vulnerability is a great gift as it opens him up to reveal his inner feelings to his Divine Feminine. He must be absolutely sure that his feelings and emotions are safeguarded by his Divine Feminine for him to be able to open up fully.


But sadly, it's as if our feminine energy is tied up in one big hard ball. It's time to understand, accept, let go, and self-actuate. What I have learned is when my mind is not in a place of running the show, then my body goes into a place of balance and harmony and then my soul can be in a place of Divine Peace.


Why are these concepts important and how do they relate to each other?

We can summarise the article thus far in terms of the characteristics of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine in the following chart:


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The Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine Traits


Any woman, man, trans-gendered or non-gendered person embodies both divine masculine and feminine energies. This is not about gender or sexuality.


It is, however, also an aspect of masculine and feminine psychology, essential stages of our spiritual journey. In Jungian psychology, which has much to teach humanity, the goal of the individuation process (spiritual journey and psychological transformation) is the Self, the God-image in the human psyche. If God is androgynous, it is logical that the purified masculine ego should have to unite in marriage with the Divine Feminine, in order to achieve this goal. This sacred marriage is called the hieros gamos. Pictures depicting it can be found in many medieval alchemical texts.


That the Divine Feminine is the key to a man’s spiritual development is clear in some famous literary texts, which we can describe as quasi-mythological, since great literature sometimes elevates itself almost to the status of mythology. The final line, thus the climax, of Goethe’s Faust is “The Eternal Feminine draws us above”. A statement by Sarah Colvin, professor of German at Edinburgh University, demonstrates the success of the patriarchal religions in almost completely obliterating all notion of the Divine Feminine from modern consciousness. She said: “Faust is saved at the end by a figure of the eternal feminine, which has caused havoc in scholarship, because people don’t know quite what it means. And it’s sometimes been taken to mean the rather clichéd notion of the ideal woman, who lets men off the hook of behaving well, because she’s doing it for them. But on the other hand you could also see the Eternal Feminine as a great kind of opposite pole, again to male politics, masculine discourse, male rhetoric, and a space of aesthetic education”. Neither of these alternatives does justice to the true meaning of the Divine (Eternal) Feminine as a religious concept, which is what it actually is. So even educated scholars are clueless about the Divine Feminine, Western culture having been indoctrinated by the male monotheism of the Judaeo-Christian tradition. Other well known literary examples are:

  • Penelope, who represents the Divine Feminine of Odysseus in Homer’s Odyssey. His long journey is an obvious symbol of the arduous spiritual path of return to his home, and his wanderings can be seen as a development of the Feminine within his psyche, as he encounters Calypso, Nausicaa, Circe, the Sirens, Scylla and Charybdis, and eventually his wife Penelope.

  • Beatrice, in Dante’s Divine Comedy, who replaces the Roman poet Virgil, his guide for the earlier stages of his journey, at the threshold of Paradise, since she is able to lead him to a vision of God. She is a clear example of a female figure leading the searching soul onwards and upwards, as explained by brittanica.com: “Dante is met by Beatrice, embodying the knowledge of divine mysteries bestowed by Grace, who leads him through the successive ascending levels of heaven to the Empyrean, where he is allowed to glimpse, for a moment, the glory of God”.

  • Miranda in The Tempest, with whom the spiritual aspirant Ferdinand unites in marriage as the culmination of his inner transformation. Shakespeare insists on the divine nature of this marriage by having the goddesses Juno and Ceres attend.

The Odyssey demonstrates that the idea of union with the Divine Feminine goes back over 2,500 years. Perhaps our poets and playwrights know better than our scholars and theologians.


From early Chinese writings describing Yin and Yang more than 3,000 years ago to Carl Jung, the famous Swiss psychologist, philosopher and spiritual teacher, and his revelations on the Anima and Animus to psychologists defining the right and left brain as masculine and feminine to modern energy healers defining the whole left side of the body as feminine and the right as masculine, we as humans have sought out the divine separations of male and female. It makes sense that today’s seeker would struggle to understand just what all the fuss is about. Let’s take each in turn and try to come to some understanding.


Originally, Yin and Yang were not meant to apply to the sexes of mankind. The earliest relics depict an attempt to describe opposites. The day is full of light and night is absent of light or the sunny side of the mountain is bright while the shady side lives in shadow are a more apt description of early Yin/Yang.


Carl Jung, in his observations of human psychology, described the hidden male within the female as Animus and the hidden female within the male as Anima. Jung believed that Women and Men predominantly associated with their female or male energy but that each had within them the opposing energy to some degree. These hidden and opposing energies created the opportunity for movement. In Jung’s world, male energies were associated with action, power, and the abstract while female energies encompassed creativity, passivity, and receptivity. It is easy to see, for example, that action(male) would be less effective without creativity (female). We house these energies within ourselves so that we may complete the circle ourselves.


Herein lay the crux to our understanding. Some of us started this exploration thinking of ourselves as either male or female. Perhaps we were bludgeoned by the power of societal definitions of the sexes.


There are light and dark sides of each energy for you to draw parallels upon. To put it simply - masculine energy gives and feminine energy receives. There is a duality to nature in the way that we understand the world and also personal growth and transformation.


We are dualistic in nature as human beings as part of our human conditioning and experience. Deepak Chopra writes “The conflict between who we are and who we want to be is at the core of the human struggle. Duality, in fact, lies at the very centre of the human experience. Life and death, good and evil, hope and resignation coexist in every person and exert their force in every facet of our lives. If we know courage, it is because we have also experienced fear; if we can recognise honesty, it is because we have encountered deceit. And yet most of us deny or ignore our dualistic nature.”


The Masculine/Feminine energies represent the expression and traits of the two energetic polarities that exist within all of us. While it is common to associate men with “the masculine” and women with “the feminine”, it’s important to note that these energies are not necessarily specific to gender, nor do they dictate sexuality. We all embody both, but will generally have a dominant or “core energy”. Ideally, this is the energy you want to operate from. The key is to understand how these energies are expressed and how they complement each other to create polarity, because that is where the magic happens!


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There is duality to the Universe: We find it everywhere: Yin & Yang, Masculine & Feminine.


The symbol of Yin and Yang, the black and white swirl within a circle with a dot of the opposite colour in each, gave us a clue that we are not at all black and white. What is the truth about male and female energies? To find the answer, we had to strip away images of men and women as portrayed in movies, television, and the news. The man or woman of today’s media is not a depiction of the divine and we cannot find truth there. When you take away media images, you are left with looking to your friends, family, acquaintances, and those in your wider community. And deeper, you are forced to look at yourself. We like to associate. The divine feminine becomes something to align with or to be defined by and this is the problem. The symbol of Yin and Yang is key. We humans are, like the symbol, comprised of opposing forces. Masculine and feminine energies swirl within us in a delicate balance. When we have too much of one energy or lack of another, we feel that imbalance. Action without wisdom or courage without patience, the lack of one energy shows itself immediately. When we choose to identify with one energy/quality over another, we further that imbalance.


Perhaps we need polarity for attraction. Think of it like a magnet. Sexual attraction and intimate connection will thrive in a relationship where there is a distinct polarity between the energies of the people involved. The more opposed the individual energies are, the stronger the attraction will be in the relationship. Sexual polarity = physical chemistry = the magnetic pull you feel when you meet someone with an energy opposite to your own. When we wear multiple masks it’s hard to develop that deep intimacy. Bring that polarity back however and attraction returns.


As children, many of us are pushed into the box of male or female. Many cultures struggle with the ‘in-between’ and so pink painted bedrooms lead to frilly lace dresses and a whole laundry list of ‘female’, while blue walls and toy motorcars lead to defining the stereotypical ‘male’, as the ‘in-between’; trans-gendered or non-binary, are pushed to the fringes. We have all experienced this push to associate with the one or the other and here begins the difficulty in becoming whole and balanced. The qualities that belong to the divine feminine are not the sole possessions of women no more than the qualities of the divine masculine belong solely to men. Association will not help you integrate these energies. So what will? We learned that our gender, whether physical or by identification, is not what defines the divine. We also learned that we were not universally strong in all of these qualities. As any human seeking wholeness, we must journey towards our goal. Knowing of the existence of these energies and their qualities is perhaps the first step. We need to nurture our strengths and grow where we are weak. This is evolution.


Our men’s and women’s circles set out with a simple purpose, discover the divine qualities of male and female energies. Through meditation, the practice of Qigong, the study of Kabbalah, and dialectic conversation we found ourselves seated at the fire feeling and describing these opposed yet complimentary energies. What we uncovered was that we needed to disassociate with ideas of male and female. The divine masculine is energy of action, courage, power, and the abstract. The divine feminine is energy of patience, wisdom, flexibility, and nurturing. The combination of these energies allows motion when blended. Perhaps we had it all wrong by separating into men and women’s circles.


Harmony involves union. Yoga means 'union.' Even DNA is a double helix. One strand supports, binds to, and creates the other. And all evolved beings are require sexual reproduction. Even at atomic level there are protons and electrons. One only sees the stars when there is darkness. Function and dysfunction. Wounding and healing. Duality is everywhere in nature. That includes the shadow and Higher Self. This is why becoming whole and integrating our parts is so important. Whole within and whole together. Deep connection. Deep compassion. It is only then another shows you compassion that you accept your Self. This involves connection, not attachment. Each person is the whole universe. And that universe is divided into two, harmoniously. When in harmony with each other, they create a numinous state of being that is ethereal, effulgent, sacred, divine.


The concepts relate to each other in a divine harmonious mysterious liberating intimate dance in full synchronicity, reflecting creation and embracing our illuminated dark sides. The feminine is the Oracle, and the masculine provides the structure and leadership to turn the vision into reality. The dance is always in favour of both, and there is no winner or loser and no one wiser than the other. Both compliment one another, and ultimately need each other to make the vision a reality, the vision of union. It is a ballet of giving & taking, opening, caring and receiving, pushing the limitations and evolving in fulfilment. This creates magic and miracles. Moment to moment. Lost in timeless scared presence, deep in open hearts without the mind and overthinking, wordless as the divinity that it expresses is beyond words. They recognise a similar pattern in their paths which has led them to unite eventually, walking hand in hand and side by side on the path of truth.


The Divine Masculine energy will help you achieve your goals, set goals, move forward in life, think logically and take directed actions to whatever you’d like to do and be in life. Without the Divine Feminine energy, the Divine Masculine is lost. Imagine a ship without a captain. It still might go somewhere. The directions are, however, random and the destination is not set because the ship just drifts across the seas of life. The Divine Feminine, being the free-flowing ocean, should always know where she needs to flow. Or else she puts herself in too much stress to enjoy her journey. Due to the Divine Masculine’s characteristics, the Ego feels at home. Just think about it: The Divine Masculine loves competition, loves to win, always looking for the next level and upgrading. A good balance of the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine brings perfect balance within and without, for example in a relationship. Both energies are crucial and essential to live a truly fulfilled life. And have a balanced, passionate, loving relationship.


The Ego is the expression of insecurities, subconscious behavioural patterns, trigger points from past experiences and the need to be right. Whilst the Ego can be beneficial for the Self, such as self protection, it is rather destructive when let off the chain. A Divine Masculine acknowledges his insecurities and trigger points and is constantly working on improving himself, his behaviour, his expression of Self in the outer world.


Neither wants to be controlled or possessed, that is dysfunction. Thich Nhat Hanh said "You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free." Ownership means holding each other, with needs and desires catered for in each other's best interests. It is not attachment, attention seeking or validation, it is deep connection and emotional intimacy. Feeling safe enough to be vulnerable, holding space to show up however each other wants, in a strong sacred space where femininity and masculinity can bloom. Using each other's gifts to serve the other, building strong foundations and stepping consciously into their roles.


The Divine Feminine in his relationship is the ocean underneath his ship upon which he sails. She gives him the freedom to navigate and move towards his destiny. His Divine Feminine is a crucial part in his life. She gives him guidance on a spiritual, emotional and intellectual basis. She nurtures him with her magic, her radiance, her free flow through life. It is the Divine Masculine’s biggest joy to see his Divine Feminine radiating and flowing through life without any restrictions. In a relationship, it is the Divine Masculine which creates the underlying stability that the Divine Feminine needs to flow freely. His firmness, integrity, values, kindness, strength and unshakeable willingness to build is what enables the Divine Feminine to relax in him.


If the Divine Feminine is the Source from which we all spring, the Divine Masculine is the infinite variety and multiplicity of forms that we can take as extensions of that Source. The fact that human beings, and all other life forms, can take infinite forms, shapes, and permutations is life expanding and proliferating. Diversity of form is the Divine Masculine principle.


The Purpose of the Divine Masculine and Feminine is to Form a Perfect Union

This union is the essence of Yoga, and the purpose of life. To define love as complete there must be two elements in balance: Fire and Water. Your mind is the mother of all creation. She is the power within the seed that surges forth against all odds, and you are at odds with her if you are playing a victim in the game called life.


So, the Divine Masculine is driven and grounded. The Divine Feminine is chaotic wild creative free. Manifestation is the dance between having something in your mind and having it in the world. How we create something in the world based on our energy and how we attract things. You set your desire and it manifests. It is the feminine to desire something and want something. The First step: So the feminine sets the desire for something they want to create. The masculine is "I am committed to having this." Second step: Taking small steps in the direction in which you want to create. Third step: Is the universe bringing to me what I want. This last is the magic, which is also feminine.


The awakened masculine aspect of us, which is our ability to acknowledge what we know from our own experience, rather than from what we are told, understands the importance and value of the feminine aspects. As the divine feminine's protector and champion, the awakened masculine is willing to explore emotional availability, compassion, receptivity and innocence and expression. He is in service to the awakening divine feminine. The awakening masculine supports the feminine aspect in visionary women and men, so they can bring their gifts into the world. He values and cherishes energy, and uses it consciously.


The un-awakened masculine aspect has a vague idea of his purpose, but cannot really speak it. He lives in fear, but cannot identify the source. He is subject to the influences of the mainstream media where his ideas of reality are reinforced. He is one who is caught in what he's been told all his life, and has never re-evaluated his belief systems. He is in a survival or autopilot mode much of the time. Happiness comes in bursts, but he may have difficulty expressing it. When he is unhappy, he looks outside himself for the cause. He is intimidated by what he doesn't understand, and may criticise it freely. His belief systems are mostly fixed. His sexual appetites drive him, but they never really nourish him. He relies on sources outside himself to define his reality. The un-awakened masculine aspect is always trying to control everyone, and passes judgment on all those who think differently. They shun or even kill the ones who have different beliefs.


A cosmic game, it seems, is afoot. The long-dormant energies of the Divine Feminine are awakening, and beginning to permeate all aspects of our lives. This sacred feminine consciousness teaches us the more refined arts of love, and reveals the healing and wholeness that await us as we reclaim our passion and inner authority as evolved women and men. Thus, the essential link is remembered as the "God-ness" within. It comes forth and transforms the mundane into the sacred. As we learn to surrender to this energy, we receive the inner guidance we have been looking for, which enables us to awaken to sustainable, everlasting love and passion in our lives.


How do these concepts align with spiritual awakening and personal and collective transformation?

Carl Jung was an expert in the field of shadow work, and references in his teachings that archetypes; which are universal, inborn models of people, behaviours or personalities that play a role in influencing our human behaviours; are present and create the foundations of human behaviour. A strong archetype within the masculine energy of the Father archetype, it is prevalent throughout all of history and cultures and takes on the form of God, king, leader, devil, holy man, wise man and, of course, the father or father figure. As with all Jung’s work, within any archetype both light and dark exist. The dark aspects correspond to the shadow in the form of judge or tyrant. The balanced side of the father archetype suggests law, order, discipline, rationality, understanding and inspiration. The unbalanced father refers to any person in a position of authority who is vindictive, rageful, brutal, rigid, controlling, selfish, withholding and has a cold intellectual way of relating. This is very reminiscent of projection in people who have not done their shadow work, which is so critical to transformation and spiritual awakening as it is only then that we drop our fears and shame, and find our true power, while stepping out of creating conflict and drama with the world and those that we love. There is a transformational call to men to take on challenges where, although they might have elements of competitiveness, the journey is more important than the outcome: This involves not seeking validation over growth. They should not be afraid of stepping into their power, all shadow work. Men should ensure self-care and spiritual wellbeing, ensuring time for stillness and silence, yoga and meditation, being grounded to nature, the earth and their body, their inner strength: With mental clarity comes intuition and decisiveness.


No matter our gender identity, we are all a mix of both masculine and feminine energies, and each has a divine purpose toward helping us reach our highest purpose. When our own masculine and feminine energies are out of balance, we can experience inner conflict, difficulty making decisions, and crises of a spiritual or emotional nature. Similarly, when these energies are out of balance in a greater sense on the scale of a whole culture or society, that is when we experience conflict, power struggles, and other symptoms of this energy imbalance.


In our current society, we are experiencing an imbalance between the masculine and feminine energies; our world (especially the western world) has leaned too far in the direction of the masculine energy, and without enough feminine energy to balance it out, a great deal of the Wounded Masculine is playing out on the world stage, responsible for conflict, violence, and unhealthy competition in many forms. By injecting more feminine power into our individual lives and into our communities, we can (and, in many cases, already are) slowly tipping the scales back toward a healthy balance. This will help to alleviate the current dynamics that dominate not only global interactions but personal ones, in which we see the codependent Wounded Masculine tangling with a Wounded Feminine . As we each seek to heal our own inner wounds and traumas and better incorporate a balance of these energies, we can each step more fully into our own power, living lives led with love and spreading that love outward like a healing wave, manifesting true abundance.


What we’re taught and shown about masculinity within society and organised religion isn’t Divine Masculinity, it’s Wounded Masculinity. It's the soul crying out for healing. It's childhood trauma that has been buried alive. It’s what happens when the divine isn’t appreciated. It’s what happens when toxicity creeps in. If the masculine can make the choice to heal himself, through expressing his vulnerability and feeling the emotions, they can be put to rest. Rather than take responsibility for his actions in early adulthood, and seek help for the horrific childhood he endured and the wounds it caused, he lashed out and decided he would just behave however he wanted. Not considering how it affected everyone around him, including himself. He then does not need to go through life as his Wounded Inner Child, he can awaken to his divine Higher Self, his Divine Masculine. It is not the responsibility of the Divine Feminine to fix the Wounded Masculine. But she can help him heal by seeing him with radical compassion. When you’re with someone who lays themselves bare, who opens their mind, body, and spirit to you in an effort to heal, you can’t help but feel like you’ve been given the greatest gift. Over the course of his journey, he’s told me things he’s never shared with another soul and that feels so powerful, I can’t help but do the same in return. That kind of intimacy can’t be forced or faked. Masculinity doesn’t have to be outwardly strong and feral. It can be soft, feminine, fragile, tender, and loving and still be strong. It takes strength and courage to be yourself, as a man, especially in today’s world. When masculinity encompasses gentle, quiet strength and a willingness to put in the work to be a better person every single day, well, that’s just magnetising all around.


Namaste.


Sending you love, light, and blessings brothers.


Olly

Dr Olly Alexander Branford MBBS, MA(Cantab), PhD.

Fully qualified and certified coach


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Hello,

I am very pleased to meet you. Thank you for reading this far. I very much look forward to connecting with the highest version of you, to seeing your highest possibility, and to our conversations. Please do contact me via my email for a free connection call and a free experience of coaching.

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Dr Olly Alexander Branford MBBS, MA(Cantab), PhD

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I have a Bachelor's degree in Natural Sciences from Trinity College, Cambridge; a Master's Degree in Philosophy from Trinity College, Cambridge; a PhD Doctorate in Scientific Research from University College London (UCL); a Medical Degree (MD/MBBS) from The Royal Free Hospital School of Medicine, London and have been a doctor and reconstructive trauma and cancer surgeon in London for 20 years. I have published over 50 peer reviewed scientific journal articles, have been an associate editor and frequent scientific faculty member, and am the author of several scientific books. I have been awarded my Diploma in Transformative Life Coaching in London, which has International Coaching Federation (ICF) Accreditation, as well as the UK Association for Coaching (AC), and the European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC). I have been on my own transformative journey full time for over five years and I am ready to be your guide to you finding out who you really are and how the world works. I have written 400 articles for you and an eBook to guide you on your transformative journey, which are all available for free on my website - click on the link below:


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